I agree with you. Adjustment to accommodate others is an essential factor that promotes relationships. Who knows tomorrow you may be in need of others support and adjustment.

In India most of the people are much selfish. They think about their own safety and their happiness. Very few people think and implement their kindness and respect towards old age people. 

Tomorrow they themselves will be ill treated by their children if they ill treat the old today.

In many cases where parents have a tough time with their children, one has to look back and see whether they have done the same with their parents.One of my neighbors has her mother living with her and her mother in law , who stays alone comes to visit them, she makes it sound as if it is an ordeal.Her son who is a teenager loves his paternal grand mother and says openly that she too should stay with them.In later years he may question his parents too.

usha manohar wrote:

In many cases where parents have a tough time with their children, one has to look back and see whether they have done the same with their parents.One of my neighbors has her mother living with her and her mother in law , who stays alone comes to visit them, she makes it sound as if it is an ordeal.Her son who is a teenager loves his paternal grand mother and says openly that she too should stay with them.In later years he may question his parents too.

 

If you treat your parents with love and care today, the same will be reciprocated with the same love by your children tomorrow.

Economic compulsions have made earlier joint family culture give way to dispersed nuclear families. Young couples get so used to leading individualistic lives with both of them working that the arrival of parents disturbs their equilibrium. I know of a housing society in my city where almost every families children have settled in USA. The parents were in competition in encouraging them to do so. Now every evening they meet and lament the fact that they have built big houses and their children do not want them to come over. It is no use lamenting the reality which is that economic condition and availibility of living space goes a long way in deciding whether children will keep their old parents with them. What will happen  to them when they grow old is too far in time today.

vijay wrote:

Economic compulsions have made earlier joint family culture give way to dispersed nuclear families. Young couples get so used to leading individualistic lives with both of them working that the arrival of parents disturbs their equilibrium. I know of a housing society in my city where almost every families children have settled in USA. The parents were in competition in encouraging them to do so. Now every evening they meet and lament the fact that they have built big houses and their children do not want them to come over. It is no use lamenting the reality which is that economic condition and availibility of living space goes a long way in deciding whether children will keep their old parents with them. What will happen  to them when they grow old is too far in time today.

 

That is a hard reality, I agree with you with the core of my heart. That is the story of most of us including myself.

suni51 wrote:

vijay wrote:

Economic compulsions have made earlier joint family culture give way to dispersed nuclear families. Young couples get so used to leading individualistic lives with both of them working that the arrival of parents disturbs their equilibrium. I know of a housing society in my city where almost every families children have settled in USA. The parents were in competition in encouraging them to do so. Now every evening they meet and lament the fact that they have built big houses and their children do not want them to come over. It is no use lamenting the reality which is that economic condition and availibility of living space goes a long way in deciding whether children will keep their old parents with them. What will happen  to them when they grow old is too far in time today.

 

That is a hard reality, I agree with you with the core of my heart. That is the story of most of us including myself.

 

I appreciate your frankness in admitting to my observations which are also based on my own experience and observations. Thanks.

vijay wrote:

suni51 wrote:

vijay wrote:

Economic compulsions have made earlier joint family culture give way to dispersed nuclear families. Young couples get so used to leading individualistic lives with both of them working that the arrival of parents disturbs their equilibrium. I know of a housing society in my city where almost every families children have settled in USA. The parents were in competition in encouraging them to do so. Now every evening they meet and lament the fact that they have built big houses and their children do not want them to come over. It is no use lamenting the reality which is that economic condition and availibility of living space goes a long way in deciding whether children will keep their old parents with them. What will happen  to them when they grow old is too far in time today.

 

That is a hard reality, I agree with you with the core of my heart. That is the story of most of us including myself.

 

I appreciate your frankness in admitting to my observations which are also based on my own experience and observations. Thanks.

 

I guess this is the reality today...My 3 children too live abroad, thankfully so far they have been visiting home every year but one cannot expect it of them to do so later when they have more responsibilities ..

None can deny stark reality. My children are also away from me leading a happy life. But I take it into my stride.