Funny jokes

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Wife says to husband: "I had a dream yesterday night that you gifted me with a diamond ring. Now, what does that mean"?

Husband says: "Am not sure, dear, Will let your know tonight"
Wife waits eagerly for her husband to return. The husband comes and gives her a pocket book- "The Meaning of dreams"!

20 Replies

Height Of Illiteracy:


You Take A Blade
And
Write Your Lover’s Name On Your Arm.
.
.
.
.
.
.

And
Make A Spelling Mistake.
Very good jokes here. Thanks for sharing jokes here.


Banta: Name the 3 fastest means of communication.

Santa : Telephone, TV, Tell-a-woman...
The girl asked to the boy, “Are you sure you love me and no one else?”

The boy replied, “Dead sure, I have checked the whole list again yesterday.”
Ha ha ha Aastha, that's a nice one!! :laugh: :laugh:
Husband wanted to call the hospital to ask about his pregnant wife, but accidently called the cricket stadium.

He asks, "How’s the situation?"

He was shocked & nearly died on hearing the reply.

They said, "It’s fine. 3 are out, hope to get another 7 out by lunch, last one was a duck!".


:laugh: :laugh:
My God!!! :silly: :silly: :silly:
What a fun is this Kumaresh??? :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
Conversation between two women

1st : My doctor advised me to take rest and especially i should not cook at all.

2nd : What happened to you? Do you have any health problem?

1st : No. Iam completely allright. But my husband is suffering from severe stomach pain.
:woohoo:
VEry nice one Meean....

You are making us laugh by your jokes...

Thanks a lot....

Keep it up..

@Abid

Thanks !! :laugh: :laugh:
A public meeting was going on and a person dressed in such a way that it is not possible to guess whether it is a guy or girl.Let's call this unknown personality as X.

On seeing this, an old man asked the young man standing next to him "Can you tell me whether that person is male or female"?

On hearing this, the person sitting next to X told the old man "She is my daughter". Old man replied "Sorry Sir. I didn't expect that you can be the father of this girl". A reply came back immediately like "No Sir.Iam mother of this girl".

The old man fainted.


Friends,

If you can understand this joke, then laugh loudly :woohoo: :woohoo: . Otherwise don't scold me for posting this :( :(
I laughed because I understood.. :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

nice one...
In a practical Exam, Examiner showed legs of bird and said: "Tell the bird’s name"

Santa:"I dont know"

Exminer: "You are failed.Whats your name?"

Santa: "You see my legs, and tell me."
Wife vs Husband

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"
"Yep," the wife replied , "in-laws" :laugh:
That was a Grt tit for tat!

Another one:

A Wife and husband start communicating only by signs. They are not speaking to each other since 3 days.

One day husband writes on paper " Please wake me up at 5 in the morning tomorrow..I have some work.." and gives it to his wife.

The next morning by the time husband wakes up, it is 7 in the morning and besides him is the paper "Wake up, it is 5 in the morning."!

"Interesting Confusions"


1. Can u cry under water?

2. Do fish ever get thirsty?

3. Why don’t birds fall out of trees when they sleep?

4. What do u call a male lady bird?

5. Why is it called building when it’s already built?

6. When they say dog food is new & improved in taste, who tastes it?

7. If money doesn’t grow on trees then why banks have branches?

8. Why does a round pizza come in sqaure box?

9.Why doesn’t glue, stick to its bottle?


:) :) :laugh:

World’s smallest resignation letter?

Respected sir,

I love Ur wife.

Thank you


:woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo:
Person 1 : My wife slipped from the train

Person 2 : Have you pulled the chain?

Person 1 : Yes. I pulled the chain.But i could get only 5 savaran of gold out of 20 savaran. :laugh:
One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and
decides to take a nap.
Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat
out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads her book. Along
comes a Game Warden in his boat.
He pulls up alongside the woman and says, “Good morning, Ma’am. What
are
you doing?”

“Reading a book,” she replies, (thinking, “Isn’t that obvious?”)

“You’re in a Restricted Fishing Area,” he informs her.

“I’m sorry, officer, but I’m not fishing.
I’m reading.”

“Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start
at
any moment. I’ll have to take you in and write you up.”

“If you do that, I’ll have to charge you with sexual assault,” says the
woman.

“But I haven’t even touched you,” says the game warden.
“That’s true, but you have all the equipments. For all I know you could
start at any moment.”

“Have a nice day ma’am,” and he left.

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads.
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: That was really fun stuff thank all of you who contributed here. I had a good laugh. :)
Son: "Dad, I am sure YOU can you write in the dark, cant you"?
Father: "Yes, I can, to some extent"
Son: Ok.. "then can you put your signature here to test? This is my report card!".
Very funny jokes are being shared here by the members!!!!
Keep it up friends!!!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

Topic Author

S

Sridevi

@hello123

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Created Sunday, 16 May 2010 06:45
Last Updated Tuesday, 30 November -0001 00:00
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