Lacking in social manners

Exactly what I feel on this topic. Most of us do not have civic sense that makes or breaks a country. Sometimes I feel we are too selfish or like to be ruled by martial law. We do not follow rules unless someone is watching us and instructing us to follow the rules with powers in his hands.

suni51 wrote:

Exactly what I feel on this topic. Most of us do not have civic sense that makes or breaks a country. Sometimes I feel we are too selfish or like to be ruled by martial law. We do not follow rules unless someone is watching us and instructing us to follow the rules with powers in his hands.

Very true Sunil because Indians , when they visit foreign places know how to follow rules although some of them who are beyond repair ,stand out like a sore thumb even there ..

usha manohar wrote:

suni51 wrote:

Exactly what I feel on this topic. Most of us do not have civic sense that makes or breaks a country. Sometimes I feel we are too selfish or like to be ruled by martial law. We do not follow rules unless someone is watching us and instructing us to follow the rules with powers in his hands.

Very true Sunil because Indians , when they visit foreign places know how to follow rules although some of them who are beyond repair ,stand out like a sore thumb even there ..

I have seen such Indians in Canada, Australia and Dubai or wherever I went during my stay in different countries. And then they complain about beating and all in other countries. Most of the time the Indians are responsible for bad treatment they get for their loose behavior. 

Not Following the rules is something which is inherent in an Indian barring a few. Another aspect you see in the trains. One lifts away my magazine without bothering to say a word to me. It's not all. After scanning he passes it on to another, then to another . And ultimately when I look got my mag, I have to go all the way till the last seat in the compartment only to see the other gentleman (?) sleeping with my magazine under his head. HEY RAM !!!

rambabu wrote:

Not Following the rules is something which is inherent in an Indian barring a few. Another aspect you see in the trains. One lifts away my magazine without bothering to say a word to me. It's not all. After scanning he passes it on to another, then to another . And ultimately when I look got my mag, I have to go all the way till the last seat in the compartment only to see the other gentleman (?) sleeping with my magazine under his head. HEY RAM !!!

 

You're lucky you got your magazine back, if you travel in Bihar they tear pages and distribute among other passengers, Jai Ram Ji ki.

suni51 wrote:

rambabu wrote:

Not Following the rules is something which is inherent in an Indian barring a few. Another aspect you see in the trains. One lifts away my magazine without bothering to say a word to me. It's not all. After scanning he passes it on to another, then to another . And ultimately when I look got my mag, I have to go all the way till the last seat in the compartment only to see the other gentleman (?) sleeping with my magazine under his head. HEY RAM !!!

 

You're lucky you got your magazine back, if you travel in Bihar they tear pages and distribute among other passengers, Jai Ram Ji ki.

 

My god! I'm really lucky. If a situation comes when I'm required to travel in Bihar, I'll not buy a mag. Lucky you warned me.

 

rambabu wrote:

suni51 wrote:

rambabu wrote:

Not Following the rules is something which is inherent in an Indian barring a few. Another aspect you see in the trains. One lifts away my magazine without bothering to say a word to me. It's not all. After scanning he passes it on to another, then to another . And ultimately when I look got my mag, I have to go all the way till the last seat in the compartment only to see the other gentleman (?) sleeping with my magazine under his head. HEY RAM !!!

 

You're lucky you got your magazine back, if you travel in Bihar they tear pages and distribute among other passengers, Jai Ram Ji ki.

 

My god! I'm really lucky. If a situation comes when I'm required to travel in Bihar, I'll not buy a mag. Lucky you warned me.

 

 

It is the same when people borrow books from you, they either return it after months or years , never in the same condition as it was or dont return at all...I have lost so many books and now never give books to anyone except my own  close family because relatives and even some friends have been ver lax in returning stuff they borrow , be it books, a saree or a handbag ..

usha manohar wrote:

rambabu wrote:

suni51 wrote:

rambabu wrote:

Not Following the rules is something which is inherent in an Indian barring a few. Another aspect you see in the trains. One lifts away my magazine without bothering to say a word to me. It's not all. After scanning he passes it on to another, then to another . And ultimately when I look got my mag, I have to go all the way till the last seat in the compartment only to see the other gentleman (?) sleeping with my magazine under his head. HEY RAM !!!

 

You're lucky you got your magazine back, if you travel in Bihar they tear pages and distribute among other passengers, Jai Ram Ji ki.

 

My god! I'm really lucky. If a situation comes when I'm required to travel in Bihar, I'll not buy a mag. Lucky you warned me.

 

 

It is the same when people borrow books from you, they either return it after months or years , never in the same condition as it was or dont return at all...I have lost so many books and now never give books to anyone except my own  close family because relatives and even some friends have been ver lax in returning stuff they borrow , be it books, a saree or a handbag ..

 

There is a saying, Pustakam, vanita para hastam gatam gataha. A book and a woman once leave you, will not come back. Which is why I stopped lending my books long ago.

As a rule, Indians lack manners especially when in public. I remember an incident when our clients had taken me and my colleague out for dinner while in UK. Now they had specifically asked us beforehand if we liked Italian food and we had said yes so we went to an Italian restaurant. After the food arrived and we started eating, my colleague had the first mouthful of pasta and immediately wrinkled her face in disgust saying that the pasta had no salt. She did know that people there do not add salt to most dishes so she could have politely asked for some. Instead the way she made faces totally put off our client who was a quite senior manager. This is the reason why Indians are mostly looked at with disgust by others.

Kalyani Nandurkar wrote:

As a rule, Indians lack manners especially when in public. I remember an incident when our clients had taken me and my colleague out for dinner while in UK. Now they had specifically asked us beforehand if we liked Italian food and we had said yes so we went to an Italian restaurant. After the food arrived and we started eating, my colleague had the first mouthful of pasta and immediately wrinkled her face in disgust saying that the pasta had no salt. She did know that people there do not add salt to most dishes so she could have politely asked for some. Instead the way she made faces totally put off our client who was a quite senior manager. This is the reason why Indians are mostly looked at with disgust by others.

Absolutely Kalyani, most Indians are not subtle at all, they have to show exaggerated mannerisms and be loud in their talk...I remember an incident when we took a train up Jungfrau in Switzerland and there is a continuous very interesting commentary by the driver / guide who stops and tells us about the different spots and also there are people wanting to get off at certain spots and walk up or down through a path made for trekkers and cyclists. There was a Chinese lady who wanted to get off at a certain point and walk up the mountain.

There was a group of Indian tourists who were eating and speaking loudly all the time screaming to one another drowning the comments of the driver and also the Chinese lady could not get off where she wanted and understandably she was very annoyed ...It reflects so poorly on us, only think of ourselves, so very selfish !

Let's see our Indians (I'm not talking about exceptions.)how they behave during eating be it in a social feast or a Banquet in a five star hotel.

Making slurping noises and belching loudly in such a way that the entire gathering turns towards the eater who is oblivious of all these incidents around him relishing food. I must say that such eaters are Master "Head Turners and attention Grabbers."

Very true , people make a spectacle of themselves , even n restaurants where I see many people spill food outside their plates...I dont see how this can happen ...I feel that social graces and manners should be taught right from childhood to make an individual a complete person.

True Usha. Good manners should start from home. They won't come and fall in our lap. They have to be injected by the parents.

To some extent our current education system is responsible for this kind of behavior of people. Today most of the schools in our country give more importance to the marks obtained in the mark sheets, and not on the behavior and moral issues. Very few schools pay attention to teach social values to kids. kids learn by watching what their elders are doing and try to copy them. So it is important for the elders to change their behavior and schools to focus on overall development of the kid.

Manoj Kumar Lamba wrote:

To some extent our current education system is responsible for this kind of behavior of people. Today most of the schools in our country give more importance to the marks obtained in the mark sheets, and not on the behavior and moral issues. Very few schools pay attention to teach social values to kids. kids learn by watching what their elders are doing and try to copy them. So it is important for the elders to change their behavior and schools to focus on overall development of the kid.

True Manoj. People now focus only on marks and money and ignore the more important aspects of personality such as manners and civility.

Discipline, behavioral  patterns and other good habits should start from the house. It's not advisable to depend on the schools which stage comes later. So, what I want to drive home is, all good habits should be taught in the home itself. Home should be the first school and parents should be the firstteachers.

Now, I have stopped complaining about lack of discipline and manners.  People will not improve just because of our wishes.  I have stopped using public bus because nobody believes in queue. first you have to struggle for getting in the bus. Then you will have to struggle even for going out.  Not to speak of overcrowding and discourtsy during journey. The old men as well as women feel very embarassed.  

Discipline  should be taught in the house right from the childhood. If a dog trainer can make the dog whatever he wants that the dog should do, why not humans ? If it is learned in the very initial stages of life, discipline is not a hard thing to learn and implement.

It is true that education from both school and home play an important role in moulding the character of children. They grow up by imitating their parents and friends. They follow what their teachers teach. “Yatha Raja Thatha Praja”(As the King, so are the subjects). So the king should prove his worth.

Our age old saying says MatruDevo  Devo Bhava, PitruDevo  Bhava and Acharya Devo Bhava. It's implied that discipline and good habits should start from the home first. Only then the Teacher's role starts.