Funny jokes

Santa at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible looking thing is what you call Modern art?
Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, that's a mirror!

Santa was writing something very slowly.
Banta asked: "Why are you writing so slowly?"
Santa: "I'm writing to my 6 yr old son, he can't read very fast."

Flash news: A 2 seater plane crashed in a graveyard in Punjab.
Local sardars have so far found 500 bodies and are still digging for more..

Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense.
Student: The future tense is "u will go to jail".

Teacher: Did your father help you with your homework?
Student: No, he did it all by himself.

Teacher: What are some products of the West Indies?
Student: I don't know.
Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from?
Student: We borrow it from our neighbor.

Teacher:"This is the fifth time this week that i have had punish you What do you have to say?
Student: "Thank god Saterday and Sunday are holidays, Sir!"

Small boy: "Dad , can you write in the dark?"
Father: "I think so. What is it you want me to write?"
Small Boy: "Your name on the report card.

Teacher: "what's the further away, America or the Moon?"
Student: "America!"
Teacher: "America? Whatever gave you that idea?"
Student: "Simple, We can always see the moon from the india, but not america!"

Teacher: "How do you like your new house?"
Student: "Oh, we like it very much. I have a room of my own, each of my sisters has a room of her own. But poor Mum, she's still in with Dad."
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Son: "Daddy, why did you put your thumb impression on my progress report instead of your signature?"

Father: "I don't want your teacher to think that anyone with your marks could possibly have a father who can read or write."

TEACHER : PAPPU, go to the map and find North America.
PAPPU : Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?
CLASS : PAPPU!

TEACHER : PAPPU, how do you spell "crocodile"?
PAPPU : "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER : No, that's wrong
PAPPU : Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!

TEACHER : PAPPU, give me a sentence starting with "I".
PAPPU : I is...
TEACHER : No, PAPPU. Always say, "I am."
PAPPU : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

TEACHER : "Can anybody give an example of "COINCIDENCE?"
PAPPU : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."

TEACHER : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?"
PAPPU : "Because George still had the axe in his hand?"

PAPPU : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt?
FATHER : No. Why do you ask that?
PAPPU: Well, where did you get THIS mummy then?

TEACHER : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots !
PAPPU: Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair just like that at home.

TEACHER : Now, PAPPU, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating ?
PAPPU: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.

TEACHER : PAPPU, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his ?
PAPPU: No, teacher, it's the same dog !

TEACHER : PAPPU, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his ?
PAPPU: No, teacher, it's the same dog !