In my home we all speak in Bengali mainly but occasionally we converse in Hindi and English too. So, knowing more than one language is always helpful as well as makes the communication quite interesting. Still, I feel if I am among the Bengali community and people are conversing in Bengali but I fail to join them for my inability to speak or understand my mother tongue then I I will find myself totally out of place. This is definitely embarrassing.

No need to be embarrassed. There are thousands of Indians like you, who are born in one state and have grown in another state. And their numbers are growing. 

Gulshan Kumar Ajmani wrote:

We cannot be very rigid in defining mother tongue. My mother tongue is Punjabi but as I live in U.P., Hindi has become more natural to me as well as the next generation. So not Punjabi but Hindi is practically the mother tongue.  A poster has commented that he and his children no longer use Bagri so much. Sp practically, Bagri ceased to be mother tongue and for all purposes, Hindi is the mother tongue in his family. 

yes it right sir no one will speak in my family my mother tongue. My Father-in-law and Mother-in-law both are from Punjab but they never speak punjabi in their house. So non of their family speak mother tongue. All are speaking Hindi. With mother tongue knowledge of local language is also necessary. My mother tongue is Bagri but I can speak, write and read Punjabi.

Shampa Sadhya wrote:

In my home we all speak in Bengali mainly but occasionally we converse in Hindi and English too. So, knowing more than one language is always helpful as well as makes the communication quite interesting. Still, I feel if I am among the Bengali community and people are conversing in Bengali but I fail to join them for my inability to speak or understand my mother tongue then I I will find myself totally out of place. This is definitely embarrassing.

You made a good beginning. You speak in Bengali in your family. If you maintain this practice consistently, Children especially speak in Bengali as long as they are in the family. They may speak any language in the school, but certainly converse in your mother tongue with the parents.

Shampa Sadhya wrote:

In my home we all speak in Bengali mainly but occasionally we converse in Hindi and English too. So, knowing more than one language is always helpful as well as makes the communication quite interesting. Still, I feel if I am among the Bengali community and people are conversing in Bengali but I fail to join them for my inability to speak or understand my mother tongue then I I will find myself totally out of place. This is definitely embarrassing.

Language is a form of communication and as long as children are comfortable in whatever language they speak , I feel there is no need to get stressed over it. In my own case my children learnt English first since that was the most practical thing to do for me but later as they grew up, they also picked up both the mother tongue Thulu and state language Kannada, also Hindi ! So, it basically depends and need and interest ..

Children learn what they hear often in the surroundings. If they hear, Telugu, they pick up Telugu. Telugu people from Railways settled in Bengal often used to converse in Bengali even in their house. Their children too learned Bengali only because they are exposed to the language spoken in their home. It's a natural phenomenon.

@vijay

Well, the example I gave is just an assumed condition because I have no problem in reading, writing and understanding my mother tongue. 

Never forget our mother-tongue wherever we go and in whatever position we  reach. Give respect to your mother-tongue just like your mother. You should speak with your children in your mother-tongue. I never tell you to talk always in mother-tongue. You can talk them sometimes whenever you get time. Otherwise, your children cannot communicate with their grant-parents and other family members whenever you go to your native place. It will automatically break the relationship and build a big gap among family members. Therefore, always give prime importance to your mother-tongue.

True. It's not possible for the parents for communicating in their conversation always. Especially for working parents. But the parents must try to communicate as far as possible with their children in their Mother tongue.

@usha manohar

I don't feel stressed because I know extra pressure will become a problem for my son. He is a fluent speaker of his mother tongue from childhood so there is no huge problem. If he learns to read and write then it will be wonderful but as you said children learn according to their need. So, I think one day he may feel it's need.