Family values have changed in our society ...

Yes, family values and along with it social values too have undergone drastic changes. Now it has become more of an I in everything rather than WE Self benefit and self realisation is preferred more over everything else, even if it may harm others' interests. People have become more individualistic and selfish to such an extent, that it is breaking the moral fabric of our society!

Yes very true Kalyani, what is even more unfortunate is the convenient way people pass the buck and blame it on the West ! They have their own culture and we should realise that it is as precious to them as it is to us.They have traditions and values just like we have, just that they do it differently ..
I feel that the positive impact has been with regard to women gaining a lot more opportunities and financial freedom.Of course that too has its own consequences ...

True, everything that goes against the established norms is all blamed on the West! But what is conveniently forgotten is that the children are encouraged to become independent and to take their own decisions from early on and equal respect is also given to the parents' relationship with each other as a man and a wife. But here, the format is more like a mother and father first and husband and wife later, which is actually not fair to the couple. This especially happens in joint families where there are more members to be tended to and the reason why more and more couples are opting out of joint families. But sadly, there is no balance to strike between wanting to be independent and free from shackles of responsibilities, and totally ignoring your parents and other relations outside immediate families! This is not what happens in the West. They are independent through and through and do not keep blaming others for that!

The merit in west is that they have not changed. Hence they are well adjusted. In India, we have two types of family system- nuclear and joint. Transition from joint to single gives more freedom and also more difficulties. The west face no transition. Change from one system to another gives teething troubles.

Yes, family values and along with it social values too have undergone drastic changes. Now it has become more of an I in everything rather than WE Self benefit and self realisation is preferred more over everything else, even if it may harm others' interests. People have become more individualistic and selfish to such an extent, that it is breaking the moral fabric of our society!

Yes very true Kalyani, what is even more unfortunate is the convenient way people pass the buck and blame it on the West ! They have their own culture and we should realise that it is as precious to them as it is to us.They have traditions and values just like we have, just that they do it differently ..
I feel that the positive impact has been with regard to women gaining a lot more opportunities and financial freedom.Of course that too has its own consequences ...

True, everything that goes against the established norms is all blamed on the West! But what is conveniently forgotten is that the children are encouraged to become independent and to take their own decisions from early on and equal respect is also given to the parents' relationship with each other as a man and a wife. But here, the format is more like a mother and father first and husband and wife later, which is actually not fair to the couple. This especially happens in joint families where there are more members to be tended to and the reason why more and more couples are opting out of joint families. But sadly, there is no balance to strike between wanting to be independent and free from shackles of responsibilities, and totally ignoring your parents and other relations outside immediate families! This is not what happens in the West. They are independent through and through and do not keep blaming others for that!

Very true ! Joint families did serve a purpose when our society was still evolving and to a certain extent it still has its importance, more so in villages where people live together or close to one another on the same shared property.
But it is of course a totally different story in cities and people go all out to be independent disregarding even the basic values that has been taught to them...and when things go wrong blame it on someone else ..

I have no village background but I have studied their culture very closely as few of my companies manufacturing units were in distant places in rich villages of western UP and Uttrakhand. What I saw during my visits there that they look like living together but with separate kitchens and trust me the Indian lawyers are totally dependent on them. There is not a single family, which has no lawsuit going for land and other properties.
True city life is different for different reasons as most of the families in jobs have distant postings but what I feel is that they are much better off compared to combined families where you find one or the other disputes surfacing. Now choice is yours happy nuclear family or an infighting pretending family.
I agree you can still find a few happy combined families in villages but then you can find such families in cities as well.

Yes, family values and along with it social values too have undergone drastic changes. Now it has become more of an I in everything rather than WE Self benefit and self realisation is preferred more over everything else, even if it may harm others' interests. People have become more individualistic and selfish to such an extent, that it is breaking the moral fabric of our society!

Yes very true Kalyani, what is even more unfortunate is the convenient way people pass the buck and blame it on the West ! They have their own culture and we should realise that it is as precious to them as it is to us.They have traditions and values just like we have, just that they do it differently ..
I feel that the positive impact has been with regard to women gaining a lot more opportunities and financial freedom.Of course that too has its own consequences ...

True, everything that goes against the established norms is all blamed on the West! But what is conveniently forgotten is that the children are encouraged to become independent and to take their own decisions from early on and equal respect is also given to the parents' relationship with each other as a man and a wife. But here, the format is more like a mother and father first and husband and wife later, which is actually not fair to the couple. This especially happens in joint families where there are more members to be tended to and the reason why more and more couples are opting out of joint families. But sadly, there is no balance to strike between wanting to be independent and free from shackles of responsibilities, and totally ignoring your parents and other relations outside immediate families! This is not what happens in the West. They are independent through and through and do not keep blaming others for that!

The merit in west is that they have not changed. Hence they are well adjusted. In India, we have two types of family system- nuclear and joint. Transition from joint to single gives more freedom and also more difficulties. The west face no transition. Change from one system to another gives teething troubles.

Yes that makes sense, since any change is bound to come with its own advantages as well as disadvantages and it depends entirely on us how best we are able o adjust to it without totally losing our identity ..

Yes, family values and along with it social values too have undergone drastic changes. Now it has become more of an I in everything rather than WE Self benefit and self realisation is preferred more over everything else, even if it may harm others' interests. People have become more individualistic and selfish to such an extent, that it is breaking the moral fabric of our society!

Yes very true Kalyani, what is even more unfortunate is the convenient way people pass the buck and blame it on the West ! They have their own culture and we should realise that it is as precious to them as it is to us.They have traditions and values just like we have, just that they do it differently ..
I feel that the positive impact has been with regard to women gaining a lot more opportunities and financial freedom.Of course that too has its own consequences ...

True, everything that goes against the established norms is all blamed on the West! But what is conveniently forgotten is that the children are encouraged to become independent and to take their own decisions from early on and equal respect is also given to the parents' relationship with each other as a man and a wife. But here, the format is more like a mother and father first and husband and wife later, which is actually not fair to the couple. This especially happens in joint families where there are more members to be tended to and the reason why more and more couples are opting out of joint families. But sadly, there is no balance to strike between wanting to be independent and free from shackles of responsibilities, and totally ignoring your parents and other relations outside immediate families! This is not what happens in the West. They are independent through and through and do not keep blaming others for that!

Very true ! Joint families did serve a purpose when our society was still evolving and to a certain extent it still has its importance, more so in villages where people live together or close to one another on the same shared property.
But it is of course a totally different story in cities and people go all out to be independent disregarding even the basic values that has been taught to them...and when things go wrong blame it on someone else ..

I have no village background but I have studied their culture very closely as few of my companies manufacturing units were in distant places in rich villages of western UP and Uttrakhand. What I saw during my visits there that they look like living together but with separate kitchens and trust me the Indian lawyers are totally dependent on them. There is not a single family, which has no lawsuit going for land and other properties.
True city life is different for different reasons as most of the families in jobs have distant postings but what I feel is that they are much better off compared to combined families where you find one or the other disputes surfacing. Now choice is yours happy nuclear family or an infighting pretending family.
I agree you can still find a few happy combined families in villages but then you can find such families in cities as well.

There is a lot of truth in what you say sunil, I too have seen this happen when it is a question of jointly owned properties.people are barely on talking terms although they live in the same house ...there are instances where there are several doors to the same house since it has been divided ...so joint family is definitely not the best solution, I guess it has lost its purpose now !

Yes, family values and along with it social values too have undergone drastic changes. Now it has become more of an I in everything rather than WE Self benefit and self realisation is preferred more over everything else, even if it may harm others' interests. People have become more individualistic and selfish to such an extent, that it is breaking the moral fabric of our society!

Yes very true Kalyani, what is even more unfortunate is the convenient way people pass the buck and blame it on the West ! They have their own culture and we should realise that it is as precious to them as it is to us.They have traditions and values just like we have, just that they do it differently ..
I feel that the positive impact has been with regard to women gaining a lot more opportunities and financial freedom.Of course that too has its own consequences ...

True, everything that goes against the established norms is all blamed on the West! But what is conveniently forgotten is that the children are encouraged to become independent and to take their own decisions from early on and equal respect is also given to the parents' relationship with each other as a man and a wife. But here, the format is more like a mother and father first and husband and wife later, which is actually not fair to the couple. This especially happens in joint families where there are more members to be tended to and the reason why more and more couples are opting out of joint families. But sadly, there is no balance to strike between wanting to be independent and free from shackles of responsibilities, and totally ignoring your parents and other relations outside immediate families! This is not what happens in the West. They are independent through and through and do not keep blaming others for that!

The merit in west is that they have not changed. Hence they are well adjusted. In India, we have two types of family system- nuclear and joint. Transition from joint to single gives more freedom and also more difficulties. The west face no transition. Change from one system to another gives teething troubles.

Yes that makes sense, since any change is bound to come with its own advantages as well as disadvantages and it depends entirely on us how best we are able o adjust to it without totally losing our identity ..

Though I live more like a joint family but I understand there are advantages of both joint and nuclear family. In joint family I feel the best things is we remain together in time of happiness and sorrow and we have our owns to share our feelings unlike nuclear family where we have no one to share our feelings. :blink:

Yes, family values and along with it social values too have undergone drastic changes. Now it has become more of an I in everything rather than WE Self benefit and self realisation is preferred more over everything else, even if it may harm others' interests. People have become more individualistic and selfish to such an extent, that it is breaking the moral fabric of our society!

Yes very true Kalyani, what is even more unfortunate is the convenient way people pass the buck and blame it on the West ! They have their own culture and we should realise that it is as precious to them as it is to us.They have traditions and values just like we have, just that they do it differently ..
I feel that the positive impact has been with regard to women gaining a lot more opportunities and financial freedom.Of course that too has its own consequences ...

True, everything that goes against the established norms is all blamed on the West! But what is conveniently forgotten is that the children are encouraged to become independent and to take their own decisions from early on and equal respect is also given to the parents' relationship with each other as a man and a wife. But here, the format is more like a mother and father first and husband and wife later, which is actually not fair to the couple. This especially happens in joint families where there are more members to be tended to and the reason why more and more couples are opting out of joint families. But sadly, there is no balance to strike between wanting to be independent and free from shackles of responsibilities, and totally ignoring your parents and other relations outside immediate families! This is not what happens in the West. They are independent through and through and do not keep blaming others for that!

The merit in west is that they have not changed. Hence they are well adjusted. In India, we have two types of family system- nuclear and joint. Transition from joint to single gives more freedom and also more difficulties. The west face no transition. Change from one system to another gives teething troubles.

Yes that makes sense, since any change is bound to come with its own advantages as well as disadvantages and it depends entirely on us how best we are able o adjust to it without totally losing our identity ..

Though I live more like a joint family but I understand there are advantages of both joint and nuclear family. In joint family I feel the best things is we remain together in time of happiness and sorrow and we have our owns to share our feelings unlike nuclear family where we have no one to share our feelings. :blink:

I agree, that is the major advantage when things are going well and members of the joint family are on friendly and amicable terms, but otherwise it is the same as living in a nuclear family ...

For sure, members of nuclear families always come forward to share joys and sorrows because they want to remain in touch or at least look like sharing such moments, after all every one has to go through such phases some time or the other.

Splitting of larger families to smaller is a social process. To begin with men lived in big groups called 'kabeela'.. They would marry in the same clan or kabeela. In many clans, the children were considered as common to the whole clan. When population grew, the whold 'kabeela' could not stay together. These clans split and joint families were formed. The next split leads to nuclear family. Now it is not possible for grand parents, all brothers, their wives to stay at one place. With husband and wife both working at different places, virtually there is no family. The nuclear family also splits to individual unit- husband and wife working both and meeting on weekly holidays, children in hostels.

Yes, it is true, But,

Still in Indian culture we respect our family members.

Most Indian lives in joint family.

sharing nice topic.

There have been many changes in the institution of family in India, and some of the changes have been for the better because it gives more freedom for the members....The worst hit are the elderly people who find that the support system is lacking or comes with a lot of burden attached to it which makes life unhappy for them... Not just here,but this is alos a problem being faced by Indians living abroad ,given the link below..

http://www.indiaparenting.com/raising-children/129_285/living-together.html

There have been many changes in the institution of family in India, and some of the changes have been for the better because it gives more freedom for the members....The worst hit are the elderly people who find that the support system is lacking or comes with a lot of burden attached to it which makes life unhappy for them... Not just here,but this is alos a problem being faced by Indians living abroad ,given the link below..

http://www.indiaparenting.com/raising-children/129_285/living-together.html

I must say that we should be prepared for all situations. Even in villages they are facing such problems as younger lot is migrating to cities leaving elders behind. There is another problem with families where the children are limited to one or two and when they go off for studies and later for jobs there is no way but to live alone. Therefore this is better to develop a habit to get used to live alone when the time still permits.

There have been many changes in the institution of family in India, and some of the changes have been for the better because it gives more freedom for the members....The worst hit are the elderly people who find that the support system is lacking or comes with a lot of burden attached to it which makes life unhappy for them... Not just here,but this is alos a problem being faced by Indians living abroad ,given the link below..

http://www.indiaparenting.com/raising-children/129_285/living-together.html

I must say that we should be prepared for all situations. Even in villages they are facing such problems as younger lot is migrating to cities leaving elders behind. There is another problem with families where the children are limited to one or two and when they go off for studies and later for jobs there is no way but to live alone. Therefore this is better to develop a habit to get used to live alone when the time still permits.

I have got used to it :P and very well too, so much so that I love being alone....Of course I look forward to having my family around me, but am prepared for anything in life :)

There have been many changes in the institution of family in India, and some of the changes have been for the better because it gives more freedom for the members....The worst hit are the elderly people who find that the support system is lacking or comes with a lot of burden attached to it which makes life unhappy for them... Not just here,but this is alos a problem being faced by Indians living abroad ,given the link below..

http://www.indiaparenting.com/raising-children/129_285/living-together.html

I must say that we should be prepared for all situations. Even in villages they are facing such problems as younger lot is migrating to cities leaving elders behind. There is another problem with families where the children are limited to one or two and when they go off for studies and later for jobs there is no way but to live alone. Therefore this is better to develop a habit to get used to live alone when the time still permits.

I have got used to it :P and very well too, so much so that I love being alone....Of course I look forward to having my family around me, but am prepared for anything in life :)

Like me, I am also living but with my wife ever since my daughter went away to join BITS Pilani in 2004. Both of us resigned in 2009 and shuttling to see her, wherever she is.. These days we are baby sitting as our 15 months old GS is with us. I am having fun with him. Most of the time I am here on forums because no serious writing is possible as long as he is here.

There have been many changes in the institution of family in India, and some of the changes have been for the better because it gives more freedom for the members....The worst hit are the elderly people who find that the support system is lacking or comes with a lot of burden attached to it which makes life unhappy for them... Not just here,but this is alos a problem being faced by Indians living abroad ,given the link below..

http://www.indiaparenting.com/raising-children/129_285/living-together.html

I must say that we should be prepared for all situations. Even in villages they are facing such problems as younger lot is migrating to cities leaving elders behind. There is another problem with families where the children are limited to one or two and when they go off for studies and later for jobs there is no way but to live alone. Therefore this is better to develop a habit to get used to live alone when the time still permits.

I have got used to it :P and very well too, so much so that I love being alone....Of course I look forward to having my family around me, but am prepared for anything in life :)

Like me, I am also living but with my wife ever since my daughter went away to join BITS Pilani in 2004. Both of us resigned in 2009 and shuttling to see her, wherever she is.. These days we are baby sitting as our 15 months old GS is with us. I am having fun with him. Most of the time I am here on forums because no serious writing is possible as long as he is here.

LOL, it must be great having him around you ,he looks very active and naughty, and why not ? it is his birth right lol...children should be naughty at that age ... :cheer:

There have been many changes in the institution of family in India, and some of the changes have been for the better because it gives more freedom for the members....The worst hit are the elderly people who find that the support system is lacking or comes with a lot of burden attached to it which makes life unhappy for them... Not just here,but this is alos a problem being faced by Indians living abroad ,given the link below..

http://www.indiaparenting.com/raising-children/129_285/living-together.html

I must say that we should be prepared for all situations. Even in villages they are facing such problems as younger lot is migrating to cities leaving elders behind. There is another problem with families where the children are limited to one or two and when they go off for studies and later for jobs there is no way but to live alone. Therefore this is better to develop a habit to get used to live alone when the time still permits.

I have got used to it :P and very well too, so much so that I love being alone....Of course I look forward to having my family around me, but am prepared for anything in life :)

Like me, I am also living but with my wife ever since my daughter went away to join BITS Pilani in 2004. Both of us resigned in 2009 and shuttling to see her, wherever she is.. These days we are baby sitting as our 15 months old GS is with us. I am having fun with him. Most of the time I am here on forums because no serious writing is possible as long as he is here.

LOL, it must be great having him around you ,he looks very active and naughty, and why not ? it is his birth right lol...children should be naughty at that age ... :cheer:

You are right he is too very active and wants me to accompany him everywhere. That is the reason I a still so far behind in every thing that I can do and complete before time.

There have been many changes in the institution of family in India, and some of the changes have been for the better because it gives more freedom for the members....The worst hit are the elderly people who find that the support system is lacking or comes with a lot of burden attached to it which makes life unhappy for them... Not just here,but this is alos a problem being faced by Indians living abroad ,given the link below..

http://www.indiaparenting.com/raising-children/129_285/living-together.html

I must say that we should be prepared for all situations. Even in villages they are facing such problems as younger lot is migrating to cities leaving elders behind. There is another problem with families where the children are limited to one or two and when they go off for studies and later for jobs there is no way but to live alone. Therefore this is better to develop a habit to get used to live alone when the time still permits.

I have got used to it :P and very well too, so much so that I love being alone....Of course I look forward to having my family around me, but am prepared for anything in life :)

Like me, I am also living but with my wife ever since my daughter went away to join BITS Pilani in 2004. Both of us resigned in 2009 and shuttling to see her, wherever she is.. These days we are baby sitting as our 15 months old GS is with us. I am having fun with him. Most of the time I am here on forums because no serious writing is possible as long as he is here.

LOL, it must be great having him around you ,he looks very active and naughty, and why not ? it is his birth right lol...children should be naughty at that age ... :cheer:

You are right he is too very active and wants me to accompany him everywhere. That is the reason I a still so far behind in every thing that I can do and complete before time.

Make the most of it, you know that they grow up far too quickly and then you will hardly get to see him... :)

There have been many changes in the institution of family in India, and some of the changes have been for the better because it gives more freedom for the members....The worst hit are the elderly people who find that the support system is lacking or comes with a lot of burden attached to it which makes life unhappy for them... Not just here,but this is alos a problem being faced by Indians living abroad ,given the link below..

http://www.indiaparenting.com/raising-children/129_285/living-together.html

I must say that we should be prepared for all situations. Even in villages they are facing such problems as younger lot is migrating to cities leaving elders behind. There is another problem with families where the children are limited to one or two and when they go off for studies and later for jobs there is no way but to live alone. Therefore this is better to develop a habit to get used to live alone when the time still permits.

I have got used to it :P and very well too, so much so that I love being alone....Of course I look forward to having my family around me, but am prepared for anything in life :)

That is the case with most of the elderly now, with children moving far away for their studies and careers! I have read about several villages in Kerala where the its residents are all above age 50 and 60 because all the young, men and women both, have left them to work in Gulf countries. Really sad state of affairs but, inevitable now?? :unsure:

There have been many changes in the institution of family in India, and some of the changes have been for the better because it gives more freedom for the members....The worst hit are the elderly people who find that the support system is lacking or comes with a lot of burden attached to it which makes life unhappy for them... Not just here,but this is alos a problem being faced by Indians living abroad ,given the link below..

http://www.indiaparenting.com/raising-children/129_285/living-together.html

I must say that we should be prepared for all situations. Even in villages they are facing such problems as younger lot is migrating to cities leaving elders behind. There is another problem with families where the children are limited to one or two and when they go off for studies and later for jobs there is no way but to live alone. Therefore this is better to develop a habit to get used to live alone when the time still permits.

I have got used to it :P and very well too, so much so that I love being alone....Of course I look forward to having my family around me, but am prepared for anything in life :)

Like me, I am also living but with my wife ever since my daughter went away to join BITS Pilani in 2004. Both of us resigned in 2009 and shuttling to see her, wherever she is.. These days we are baby sitting as our 15 months old GS is with us. I am having fun with him. Most of the time I am here on forums because no serious writing is possible as long as he is here.

LOL, it must be great having him around you ,he looks very active and naughty, and why not ? it is his birth right lol...children should be naughty at that age ... :cheer:

You are right he is too very active and wants me to accompany him everywhere. That is the reason I a still so far behind in every thing that I can do and complete before time.

Make the most of it, you know that they grow up far too quickly and then you will hardly get to see him... :)

True! Enjoy his company while you can, because he will grow up big no sooner than you realize it and then he will be more attached to his various gadgets! :cheer:

Now a days even two brother can't live in one house. Both have a jealous from each other. The importance is changing in the society.

Now a days even two brother can't live in one house. Both have a jealous from each other. The importance is changing in the society.

Sibling rivalry has been present from the Mahabharata times when Kauravas and Pandavas fought ....the difference is that the surroundings and circumstances have changed now...