Customer: "You've got to fix my computer. I urgently need to print document, but the computer won't boot properly."
Tech Support: "What does it say?"
Customer: "Something about an error and non-system disk."
Tech Support: "Look at your machine. Is there a floppy inside?"
Customer: "No, but there's a sticker saying there's an Intel inside."
Heller's Law: The first myth of management is that it exists.
- It's not that good help is hard to find, it's just that bad help is so hard to get rid of.
- They say you need a can-do attitude to get ahead in life. I disagree -- many people obviously got to be Vice-Presidents of major corporations just by snapping a few pictures of their respective CEO's and his secretary.
Personnel manager: "What made you leave your last job?"
Applicant: "Sickness."
Personnel manager: "And what was the problem?"
Applicant: "My boss was sick of me!"
Personnel Manager interviewing prospective employee: "Your application states you were at your last place for 25 years. Then what made you leave the place?"
Hoperful applicant: "I was forced to-they granted me parole!"
