We might have noticed in life that no everyone becomes a successful person. Why do some people keep on overcoming their hurdles while some of them become struck in a place? Why problems are just a piece-of-cake for some people while some people bow their heads down to them? The answer comes down to positivity of mind. A positive mind has the power to overcome all the problems. The people who succeed in their lives have a firm conviction in their mind that no problem will last forever; just like the seasons of nature. Rather than running from our problems we must learn to live with them because problems are part of everyone’s life. We should try to overcome all our fears and doubts, because fear keeps us from trying new things and it keeps us small.

Remember the People Who Have Never Had Opportunities

Whenever there is a problem, never say why me, just see around yourself and you will find dozen of people who were not even given the opportunity to prove themselves. Thank god and be happy that he gave you an opportunity to prove yourself. Be happy because it could have been even worse.

Check Yourself

You should continuously ponder about your weaknesses and try to eliminate them. If you ignore or postpone some task just because you do not like it, then gradually the task become a huge one and difficult to overcome.

Think Positively

Negative thoughts have the power to destroy your dreams. A lot of negative thoughts can lead to depression and even prolonged illness. If you think negatively about a problem it will become much more difficult to overcome it. So try thinking positively about any problem after all locks are not manufactured without a key.

Keep Looking for Opportunities; Maintain Your Focus

Be vigilant and don’t let any opportunities pass by you. Always maintain your focus towards your goal, remember “Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal” rightly quoted by Mr. Henry Ford. Learn to take initiative. Don’t wait for next time as ‘time and tide wait for none’.

One has only to switch on the television to see how cases of rape have become a daily phenomenon in the Indian society. Schoolgirls going back home after their classes are kidnapped and raped. Working girls returning after office hours are raped in the taxis. Girls are lifted from bus stops, streets, even their homes and gang raped and in some cases, also murdered. Even children and minor girls are not spared. When we see these gory incidents we shiver and think what shameful degradation we have fallen to. How deep the moral rot has struck our society. Why have Indian men become so defiant to law and callous to human values? Since when has this holy land of religions become an unholy haven of rapists and murderers? Why has a society where family values were held in high esteem turned into a mob of sexual perverts and maniacs? Where has all the decency and respect for women we were so famous for disappeared? We should look into the causes of this cancerous malady and remedy it before it is too late to do anything.

In the past parents and teachers used to say that cinema and television were affecting the youth adversely. They still do. They have been joined by other equally or more powerful means of communications which are at easy reach of everyone. New inventions of science have brought uncountable benefits to man but they have also been used by evil men to their benefit. I enumerate some causes which have contributed to the crimes against women in general and rape in particular.

1. Pornography- Pornography is openly available, in print and in electronic media. They incite young men to sexual crimes and perversion.
2. Lack of moral education- A very large number of youth and men grow up without any moral education to guide them to use their sexuality in a responsible way.
3. Loopholes in the judicial system- There are many loopholes in the Indian judicial system, which allow the culprits to escape scot free.
4. Protection from parents and the powerful- Many of the perpetrators are the spoiled sons of wealthy parents or cadres of political parties in power. They use their money power or political patronage to enjoy immunity from punishment. 
5. Food habits- Food habits of India with excessive hot spices make men abnormally sexually aggressive.
6. Reluctance of the victim to report- Rape is so traumatic an experience to the victim that she finds it next to impossible to report it to the police. The judicial process is too insensitive to her trauma, suffering and feeling of humiliation. Many times the victim suffers silently and if she cannot cope with the suffering she commits suicide.

What measures can be taken to eradicate this abominable evil?

• Easy reach of pornography should be blocked. Persons indulging in providing pornography should be punished severely.
• Moral education to make growing children more responsible about sexuality must be made compulsory in schools.
• Parents must take responsibility for the moral education of their children.
• Religion is a great force which is most often manipulated to collect votes. It must be used to guide the youth to the right path.
• Loopholes in the law must be plugged. Perpetrators of crime should never be permitted to escape scot free and move around brazenly.
• The punishment for rape should not be only jail terms or fines but something that curtails the sexual powers of the culprits to such extent that they cannot abuse it even if they want to. This, perhaps, would prove to be a better deterrent than even capital punishment. 
• A special department, mainly consisting of women officers should record reports and investigate incidents of rape. Special courts with wise women judges must dispense justice. The crime of rape is an assault not only on a physical part of a woman but on her whole being, her mind, heart and psyche. Only a woman is able to understand the deep implication of this crime and do justice to a case. 
• The police department has become infamous for its dishonesty, bribe taking, doing the bidding of their so called masters, inaction, partiality, slowness to act etc. They too must realize the high dignity of their duty and fulfill it with pride and joy. They must not forget that they are not so much the guardian of law but guardian of their fellow being. They are our protectors always and everywhere. We have reposed our trust in them. Let them prove themselves worthy of this trust.
• At the same time, a few words of caution to our girls. Avoid places, dresses, company, jobs, timings that put you in danger of rape. 

With everyone’s effort, we can make our society safer and happier. It is our sacred duty to provide safety to the daughters of India. No one should be allowed to use them as disposable things.

Piyu showed me her progress report card and said, “Papa, I’ve improved my grade.” It was true. From 60% in the last exams to 80% in the recent ones she has made a leap. I tapped her back and said, “Very good, dear. I am proud of you. Do still better next time”

Nine years ago, one Sunday evening Snigdha was brought to our family. I was told her pet name was Piyu. She was four years old then, a tender and slender child. I took her up and kept her on my lap during the Sunday evening prayer service. She immediately began to call me “Kakoo”(uncle). In the next few months, how this fond address metamorphosed into “Papa” is a story of bonding between two persons. 

In the third month of her stay with us Piyu had an attack of asthma. Bina, her foster mother and I kept a vigil through the night. Before the first light of dawn we took her to the government hospital 15 km away. The doctor on duty inspected her and advised us to get her admitted to the hospital. Bina stayed back with her in the hospital. Shyamali, a nurse in our senior citizen’s home volunteered to stay with her during the night. Next day I visited her. She was looking much better. She clung to me. Her doctor advised us to keep her one more day in the hospital for observation.

 Some days later, we went to see Piyu’s mother, Manika. She lived in a tin-roofed one room shelter in her father’s land. She was bed ridden after a fall on the footsteps of her room. Her face told the misery she has been through. She must have been a beautiful lady in her better days, I thought. She was married to Kishor, a small coal dealer. As his business was low his father- in- law called him to Guwahati. His father- in- law had a grocery shop. He also taught Indian music in the evenings. He found a cashier’s job for Kishor in a private firm. One day while returning to his office after withdrawing Rs 50,000 he was kidnapped by extremists. His whereabouts are not known since. His father-in-law tried to trace him by taking the help of the police and by advertising in newspapers to no avail. Manika waited for him for a year a half. Then she came back to her father’s house in Bhabanipur village, 65 km north of Calcutta. Her uncle gave her the room where she began to spend her days of widowhood with her two daughters.

Mou, her elder daughter, propped her on the bed.  I placed Piyu in her lap. Tears began to roll from their eyes. Bina said to Manika, “Didi(eldersister), perhaps I will not be able to take care of your child as you could have. But I’ll try to be a mother to her as best as I can.”

After a month, Manika took seriously ill and she was admitted to Calcutta Medical College Hospital from where her lifeless body returned. We were informed of her demise. I was in two minds about taking Piyu to the crematorium but our director suggested that it would be right for Piyu to have a last glimpse of her mother. When we reached the crematorium Manika’s body was lying on a cot outside. I held Piyu’s hand and led her to the cot. Manika’s face looked smaller than what I had seen last. We must have stood there for less than three minutes. I led the child away to the parking place. That was when she asked me, “Papa, why have they kept mother here?” I was speechless. My heart was torn to pieces. She did not understand what had happened. Later, she was told by a tactless girl that her mother had died. Hearing it she began to cry loudly. I could do nothing but hold her close to my heart.

When Familia started an English medium school Piyu was admitted in Class One. She was an average student. She was happy and confident as her foster mother was the principal. But when another person took over the school she found herself insecure. This person was insensitive to the needs of a suffering child. This was the unfortunate time when her asthma returned. She had to be kept on special medication and care.

 In spite of setbacks Piyu has gradually improved in her studies. She is a good dancer. She was the main dancer in a group dance, which fetched a prize in the interschool competition on 15^th August. She likes to paint as well. She does well in sports. She is also learning to cook. 

She is gradually becoming independent. She comes to me when she needs my help. One day she will get married and go away from me. Still, I will be happy to have loved a child, to have helped her to grow up into a good, responsible, happy human being; for that is my vocation, my chosen work.

Let me begin with a story. Once upon a time, there lived a couple who had a son. His name was Kesu. Since his parents pampered him a lot, Kesu became a selfish and arrogant person. Time passed by and his parents grew old. So, he had to search a job for his daily expenses, to look after his parents and for their treatment. Since he was a lazy and crooked fellow, instead of searching a job, he married a rich girl. Also, he didn’t take care of his old parents. He sent them to an old age home ignoring their prayers and tears. Years moved forward. Kesu also got a boy with same character traits. He got married and seeing Kesu’s arrogant nature dumped him in an old age home, the same place where Kesu sent his parents years back. When events took shape against his expectations, Kesu couldn’t control his tears. All those things came back to his mind. He repented for his ill treatment towards his old parents years ago. But time has gone and everything was late!

Yes, old age is a phase of life that can’t be avoided. Once it comes, it never returns back and stays with us till our end in the form of wrinkles, tiredness and grey hair. Many people are in the false mirage that youth will stay with them forever and that those ‘grey hair’ won’t touch them. But very soon or later, everyone has to accept that bitter truth. Those who disrespect old people and send their parents to old homes often forget the fact that, those are their future days too! They assume, everything will remain the same. That’s why it’s told, when old leaves fall young leaves laugh.

One of the major challenges of modern India is the problem faced by disabled senior citizens whose living conditions are worse and no one present to support them at their old age. They are not free from health problems too. Recent studied have proved that more than 50% of aged people above 60 are suffering from at least one of the following diseases – high blood pressure, diabetics, heart diseases, kidney problems, memory disorders, respiratory problems or signs of depression. According to Help Age India’s report, more than 58% of those old people are not even able to meet their daily expenditure. Majority of them depend on their kids.

We lost many precious things in those broken chains

Present society gives less respect to old people. But in turn, they are losing many precious gifts too. Experiences of old people are assets and basement stones of success to new generation. But youth is not interested in listening to their words, advices or experiences. Often, some piece of knowledge is passed as chains from one generation to next, that we can’t find in books. Modern world has already witnessed many such broken chains. That’s the reason why very often, new people try to search something from past and renew it again. How many such customs, traditions, medicines, values, experiences, historic stories etc we have lost somewhere in those broken chains! Only remote chances exist for the renovation of most of them. Often, false piece of information is passed to next people due to missing of some facts. Some people may add their assumptions as facts which can’t be corrected later.

Studies have already proved that grandparents play a key role in the development of personal traits of a child, particularly mental and brain development of kids in their early ages. They teach them a lot, moral lessons and fairy tales, thus helping them to learn their first chapters of love, bond, patience, kindness and relationships that they can’t get from any university. Now cartoon channels have occupied that place, contracting kids’ wings of imagination, grasping power, special bonds shared with other people and of course do contribute obesity problems.

October 1st - International Day of older persons

It’s the duty of kids and youth to show their respect towards senior citizens and learn at least a few things from them. To remember the contributions of the old generation and make us remember to respect them, UNO put forward the idea of dedicating one day to them. It was declared in 1990 and ensures that their rights and desires are intact. Also, it asks us to develop a feeling in our mind that we are walking through the steps constructed by those, who have almost reached their last steps towards sunset. It’s a day to respect all old people of the world who did everything they can do, to build a new generation of good citizens – the same thing we are doing for our kids and nation. October 1st is celebrated as World Old Age Day all over the world and let’s promise ourselves that we will contribute whatever we can do, to see those smiling faces again.

Living their childhood once again

When a child is born, he can’t do anything without someone’s help. Even he needs someone to feed food and change his nappy. Gradually he grows and learn everything, attain health and he begins to do all activities self dependent. As age process by, his health condition deteriorates and again he reaches the same state – his childhood. It’s said that old age is the second childhood of a person. Some persons not only lose their health, but their memory too. Some need other’s help even to walk and eat. Some persons may behave just childish. Yes, he is now a child again. As parents are doing everything for a kid, it’s now the duty of kids to give them back the same help, when their parents are going through the worst phases of their life.

Kindergartens – Another version of old age homes

Now joint families are less and old age homes are increasing. Have you noticed kid nurseries are also increasing? Why so? Earlier grand parents used to look after small kids. But now, those kids are taken to some child care centre or kindergarten at the age of 6 or 8 months, while his mother goes to work. Now most of the families are staying away from home town due to jobs in big cities and towns resulting in the increase of day care centres. Grandparents may still reside in their home town looking after agriculture and fields. Earlier old age homes, family and child care centres existed together as a single entity while they are now separated to different modules for convenience.

Due to busy modern life, both kids and old people are deprived of love and care that they actually deserve. Instead, two such pools are formed separately, breaking the grand parents-grand kid relationship! Even if society justifies both no one can deny its losses too!

Laws to protect old age

When joint families existed in our country, old persons were not a burden to the family. Instead they were the most powerful persons who have a massive control over the entire family. Also, every family member respects them a lot. But as years passed by, atomic families became the new trend and thus, known or unknown, youngsters began to move away from their responsibilities of protecting their old parents. Conditions of many such persons are really pathetic, particularly if their life partner is not alive. Throughout their life they ran along with time to do everything for their kids and as time passed by, they lost their ability to move in the same pace with time. Also, during this long run, they lost their whole energy and majority of those parents even forget to save something for their future in the false belief that there is someone to help in need. But, with broken hearts, when such people have to leave their homes – the homes they built with their hard work and money and spent their whole life, nothing can replenish those tears and loneliness they feel when they were asked to go! To ensure their safety and welfare, ‘The Maintenance and Welfare of Parents and Senior Citizens’ Act was passed in 2007. It instructs the duties of every person towards his old parents and asks him to take care of them.

Many people showed their real talents at their old age

Though youth age is more energetic, old life holds more experiences. Many people have showed their real talents in their old age. Now also, many politicians and artists are active in their old age.

World famous actor George Burns got best actor Academic awards for his wonderful performance in the movie ‘Sunshine boys’ when he was 80. He says, it’s the best performance he has done on silver screen and has given him the best satisfaction. Tolstoy’s literary pieces were most impressive when he reached last stages of his life. He was 82 when he wrote the book, ‘I cannot be silent’, and this book is often compared to his most famous, ‘War and Peace’ and ‘Anna Karenina’.  Picasso’s great works were after his 90’s. His shivering hands and memory problems were not sufficient to pull him away from his passion towards painting. When Eamon de Valera was selected as the President of Ireland, he was 91. When George Bernard Shaw wrote the play, ‘Farfetched Fables’, he was going through his 93. Critics say, among all his works, this particular piece has more emotional colours, intensity and fragrance of experiences.

British philosopher Bertrand Russell worked for world peace when he was 94. Winston Churchill wrote world famous, ‘A History of the English speaking people’ during his 80’s.K.P.Kesava Menon, an established writer and editor of Malayalam wrote majority of his works at his old age. He was able to conquer his blindness through his amazing contributions to the literary world. Rabindranath Tagore started drawing at the age of 68 and he completed more than 3000 works.

A few names from artists of Indian film industry

Lata Mangeshkar started her singing career at a tender age of 15 and through the years, he has made distinct fingerprints in the history of Indian music. Each passing year made her more mature and each decade gave a fresh new voice. She got a National award for best playback singer when she was 62. Even her younger sister Asha Bhosle is not far behind. We have seen many of her mesmerizing numbers after her 60’s, particularly with A.R.Rehman’s compositions. Now also, both the sisters contribute a lot to the music industry – filmy and non-filmy. 

Angry young man, Amitabh Bachchan is known for his versatility and supreme power over Indian audience. Though he was most popular during his 30’s and 40’s, he got majority of awards during his 60’s. He won million hearts and infinite awards for his credible performances in ‘Black’ and ‘Pa’ and no doubt, these two films are milestones of his acting career. Still at 70, he is a living legend who his followed by admirers a lot and he is active in twitter and blog. Now also he works restless for films and through his TV show, ‘Kaun Banega Crorepathi’, still he wins millions of hearts and a lot of appreciation with his energetic and spontaneous performance.

A few words about one of the most versatile actor of Malayalam film industry, Tilakan. Years made him only mature and mature and if we take the past 30 or 40 years of Malayalam film industry, no doubt, he is one among those top 5 shining stars who knows the real syllables of acting. He is considered as the most versatile character actor of this industry and it was at the age of 78, he did the most memorable movie of his career – Indian Rupee.

What, we can do for our senior citizens

Forgotten old age is a big question mark raised against the modern society and it’s the duty of every citizen to ensure their happiness, safety and good conditions of living. It’s said, both gooseberry and words of elders may taste bitter first. But later, both are sweet! Yes, it shows the significance of words of our senior citizens. Let us spend a few hours for those disabled people at old homes. They need nothing else, but a few words of love and a feeling of security. Also, whenever we meet an old person in distress, let’s do some favour for him. At least, we can buy something worth for them, just help them to cross the road or offer our seat in a crowded bus. We can carry their small luggage as a form of help.

Now those grandma stories and fairy tales have almost disappeared. Only cartoon fantasies exist in kids’ imagination and memory. Such cartoon characters may entertain them, but only a few are able to give moral stories to learn. If you visit an old age home, don’t keep distance from them or see them with pity eyes. Instead show some respect towards them. Make them feel that we have learnt a lot from them and are still following their foot steps and lessons. It will surely help to blossom their frown minds and hearts at least a little bit.

It’s our duty to help those people, who have constructed our future using their past. We should attain their energy to move forward. Let’s thought for a little while, if courts and laws are needed to ensure their safety and rights. We should never create a situation where, they need to ask and buy what they actually deserve, because it’s the real shame on us to create such situations. Let us keep these promises till our fingers are sufficient to count all old age homes of our country. That’s why once Gandhiji told, ‘If I can do something for our country, my first attempt is to destruct all old age homes’. Yes, Gandhiji truly believed that it’s the duty of kids to look after their old parents. As we are Gandhiji’s true followers, why can’t we start it from our life itself?