Every body has the habit of thinking about anything and one should think before doing anything as it’s a good habit. But there are people who over think about an issue and fall prey to many diseases like depression, high/low blood pressure etc though slowly. This is the fact one cannot stop thinking in today’s competitive world, when things are difficult to achieve one has to think for anything he/she may do or has thought to start . Those who don’t think before acting may not get success in their life. Therefore one must think but should not over think for issues they get in their lives.

There are few good reasons for not thinking much:

Your thinking cannot change actions

One must always remember it that thinking can never change actions but one need to really work for it rather than just thinking. This happens with many of us we think a lot for the things and don’t act for them which un necessary lead to our failure and cause a stress for not achieving what we had thought. So we must think and should align our thinking with the situation to get over with the situation as per our desire. I always try to act more and think less about the situation and I do get benefits by it otherwise I know I may end up wasting my time.

Things may get over complicated

You must analyze what sort of problem you are in. If it is difficult then you must not make it more complicated by thinking much about it. It happens with us that any simple problem also we make it more difficult for us by over thinking Consider an example of a student who is going to give an exam. It would definitely make him more nervous if he thinks about the question paper more and more. I often have seen people forgetting things which they have studied well if they think more while going in to the examination hall. The problem with all of us is that when we do something difficult and complicated then we think it must be important but in actual it is not but the fact is anything is not difficult but we make it difficult by thinking it to be difficult.

Low performance

When we over think we make things complicated and thus we become nervous and make a mess for us. It becomes difficult for us to concentrate on the things and make a habit of just thinking about it. All of this result in our final output and our performance gets worse due to this.

Question is how to stop thinking so much?

I am a thinker but I avoid over thinking One must avoid it by always keeping few things in mind:

First and foremost is we must know that we have the habit of over thinking as there are many people who may have this habit but may not be accepting it. People who don’t accept it can’t get rid of it. When we know it then we can easily analyze the  situation where we may be over thinking and stop doing it.

Second is one should fix a limit to think say one must fix a time for thinking about a situation as 10 minutes instead of thinking about it for days. Consider an example that I should not think petrol rates are increased how I am going to cope up with it. Its better to have strategy like  to make a budget and find out the ways for saving some extra money to compensate with these increased rates rather then thinking about the increased rates for days. I feel that would be a better strategy then to over think and stress my mind for it.

Third one is important just think about present and not about the past and future. I have noticed that people who live in present are more happy in their life than those who remain worried for their future and think about their past. They must leave past and forget what happened in the past as it can’t be changed by just thinking about it though we must take a lesson for what mistakes we did in the past and should try not to repeat them in future.

These are few tips how we can stop over thinking about our daily issues which may un necessary lead to problems and can’t give us the solution for those problems.

Social networking has come out of age. It has evolved over the period of time. Today social networking is a huge business market in itself. Social networking, as the name suggests, helps us to be in touch with people, group & communities across the world. Information is shared, status updated, albums are uploaded & many more networking is executed. It has grown into a big business opportunity & also helps in business development via advertising.

Social networking sites like Facebook and Twitter are soon becoming a household name. Every individual is connected to world via these websites. Various communities have been formed, features added & still it’s evolving. Let’s have a look at 10 faces of this so-called social phenomenon.

1. Connect & Share

We all are busy in our day-to-day schedule. Be it office, business or studies, most of us have little personal time left. In this busy world, we don’t get time to contact or visit our friends & family regularly. All friends, family & relatives cannot be contacted regularly. Social networking provides a simple solution to this. Create an account with any social networking site & start sharing your thoughts, events & updates with your circle of friends. It is as easy now-a-days as it is said. You can be in touch with everybody, about their know-how & other developments.

2. Technical Advances

As Social networking evolved, it has made quite technical advances. It is after much research, innovation & hard-work that social networking has grown as we see it today. We hear about new websites everyday or about new features being added to an existing social site. As this aspect of human interaction has evolved, so have the technical advances involved. We find people, places, communities, advertisements, information, etc on social network sites now. The social networking domain is increasing at a fast pace, with respect to technical aspects as well.

3. Freedom of Ideas

Everybody has his/her own thought process. Social sites provide a single platform for everybody to share their thoughts. Be it about the government, policies, business, friends or just about anything. With its huge user base, the thoughts travel to million of people registered at the site. It doesn’t bound one’s imagination. If you have a thought or an idea, you can always share it across with your friends via social networking. The different public & private access levels ensure that the information you share reaches only the expected audiences. One is as free as himself on a social network,

4. Geography Independent

The best part of social networking phenomenon is its independence from one’s physical location. With Internet reaching the grass root level, social network too has widened its base. If you have an Internet connection, it doesn’t matter where you are located physically. A person in India can connect with people anywhere in world via social networks. The world has further shrunk by the introduction of social networks.

5. Advertising

Advertising aims at spreading certain information to as wide as audience as possible. Advertising can be in any form – written, visual, audio or graphical. As social networks increase their customer base, so is increasing their prospects as potential advertisers. Various firms, small and large businesses, or just individuals are approaching the social side of advertising. On the other hand, advertising contributes the maximum revenue generation medium for a social networking site. So the next time you think of advertising, it may be the case that social media will be the first choice.

6. Careers

As the social phenomenon is spreading, so are the employment opportunities. With such a huge information sharing system, different ideas are being shared across. In the fight of competition, social networks too are turning their heads towards providing various details about the job opportunities available worldwide. For e.g. Facebook has recently introduced its job career feature called Glassdoor, which provides various job opportunities to its users via connecting to others. Careers is one field which is being explored now by the so-called social networks.

7. The Innovation

With such a huge audience & free flow of thoughts & ideas – social networks are paving a way towards Innovation. People discuss, form communities, advertise, and innovate via social networks. These sites too keep innovating new features to be clubbed in their existent frameworks in order to keep ahead of the competition. Various new features are being added regularly to the existent social networks. Innovation is at a all time high with the advent of this social phenomenon.

8. The misuse

Every coin has two sides. As it allows free flow of thoughts, social networks are used by evil groups to spread hatred. As they directly reach the audience, these thoughts have a negative effect on society as a whole. Sometimes they are used as a weapon against any government body, or against some people. Though many sites have security features in place like report as abuse, blocked content, public & private access levels – but still loopholes can be found anywhere. Only Innovation is not enough, it is the right use that makes it a success.

9. Addiction

Today Facebook account has become a status quo. One who doesn’t have a facebook account is thought lower intellectually. It is the favorite pastime for most of the youngsters today. If you don’t have anything to do, instead of pursuing a hobby, check & update your facebook status. People are getting addicted to the social phenomenon. Don’t know what magical power it has, but it bounds you once you are into it. With features such as status update, “Like”, chatting & career opportunities, social networks are hard to resist. People are losing out on outdoor activities like sports & visiting close friends. Instead of focusing their energy in right productive direction, many people are just wasting their time on social networks just because it’s the easiest way to pass time.

10. Human Behavior

Man is a social animal. Anything that strengthens this bond is bound to succeed. Social networks have leveraged this basic human behavior of interaction. We like knowing about others & what others are doing. We are much more interested in other people’s life instead of our own. We like to remain updated about the surroundings, people & thoughts. We feel empowered with our growing awareness that we get by harnessing the features of this social phenomenon. With the evolving social networks, human behavior too is now the focus.

Social networking has its pros & cons. But whatever be the cons, it’s a rapidly spreading phenomenon. New features are evolving, more people are being added & a vast pool of information is shared. Starting with a small idea, it has grown into a full-fledged industry providing employment, generating revenue, driving innovation & sharing thoughts. The future seems to be bright for the so-called “Social Phenomenon”.

Inter Personal Relationships are Vital Connections

As social beings it is very essential and important for an individual to build and nurture the many relationships in one's life .This is an on going process and hence it is all the more important to know some basic facts. When we ask ourselves what role do relationships play in our life ? It may not be easy or one may not find a common answer to this question. It very much depends on what sort of a person you are because to some individuals relationships are paramount, and all other aspects such as work,fame ,status and creativity take a second place .To others this equation may be reversed. For them work and the thrill of pushing things to the cutting edge always scores over uncertain pleasures and pains of maintaining relationships. Similarly for some money matters the most or it may be popularity and fame depending on their personalities.

When we look at relationships in an objective manner , we see that they do affect the way we live our lives at least to a certain extent. ! Most people have misconceptions about the success of relationships , they seem to think that it happens by chance and luck has something to do with it. But the success of relationships do not happen by chance , but happens because we make the decision and work towards it to make it successful ..

What are Relationships in the first place ?

Relationships define our ability to connect with other parts of the universe. Although we tend to limit this word to our inter personal relationships with other human beings , the term also has a broader meaning that can involve animals,plants,birds ,your computer or even your car, and why not ?since we spend so much time with them.

What is common to all relationships is the need to recognise the other. Like for example : One can have no relationship with the environment if you are oblivious of it , the same is the case with your pet dog if you are not even aware of its presence . If We walk through fields, grounds,meadows busy chatting on our cell phone without even becoming aware of our surroundings , we have little connection with our surroundings.Why I bring this issue is to make the point that it is vital to stay connected with everything around you.

Making connections with others and recognising their uniqueness , no matter however fleetingly is an enriching experience...

Some ground rules

1, First of all we need to be sensitive and aware of them , meaning we should take an interest in them as people and not because of what they represent.

2, We should never try to build relationships based on our need or to fulfill some purpose of our own, such as making friends with the idea of getting some contract or a favor, marrying someone for the sake of the person's physical beauty and looks or wealth, even buying a dog with the idea of having someone to guard your property and belongings .

3, We need to focus on the welfare of the other person as well. In fact the more our focus moves away from our own needs,desires  and feelings the greater scope there is for space and depth within a relationship.But this should be genuine not put on..

4, There should be total openness and authenticity within a relationship.One must go past the need to keep up pretences and project images. One should be totally open and give and receive one another without allowing any falsity for a relationship to work and be successful.

5, Relationships take us within ourselves and when we pursue them with sufficient intensity it can actually bring us to the threshold of self realisation.

Different kinds of relationships and reasons for failure

Prominent among them is the familial and marital also between friends and relatives. The lack of communication between two people can be both the cause and effect of a host of other problems that arise in relationships.One should remember that each individual brings in his/her own mindset into any relationship and when these expectations are not realsied tension breaks out between the two people , this can happen in a marriage or any other relationship as well.

The most common reason for the breakdown of any relationship - marital,familial or even friendship , is when the people involved take each other for granted.We expect the other person to be there for us and , to do things for us but we conveniently forget to thank and appreciate them for it.When spouses go all out to point out each others fault , most of the time they never show any appreciation for the love and the caring they have received. A cool acceptance of the extra effort put in by either of the partners as their due make them want to get even .This tendency can ruin a good realtionship.

When people are married for a long time , for 15 years 20 years or 25 years whether the marriage is happy or unhappy it becomes a way of life , they cannot imagine any other ! However, in their less than happy moments couple tend to think of different scenarios but with panic since they have forgotten what life was as an unmarried person.They also may think that their marriage could do with some polishing.This has to come from both the sides. All you do by arguing and fighting on a daily basis is to let the relationship corrode which is not healthy.

A few basic differences between the way men and women think and their approach towards some common issues.

Their relationships are based on these differences in their personalities and characteristics ! They say that Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus ..

Men

1, Generally speaking a man's sense of self is defined through his ability to achieve results !

2,  Men prefer being alone when faced with major problems, they like to solve their problems alone.

3, Men feel motivated and empowered when they feel needed and wanted

4, Most men want space and would argue for the right to be free

5, If a woman doesnt ask for support a man normally assumes that he is giving enough

Women

1, A Woman's sense of self on the other hand is defined through her feelings and the quality of her relationships.

2, When faced with problems women tend to get together and talk openly about their problems.

3, Women feel motivated and empowered when feel cherished and wanted like men( the only point where they seem to have similar needs)

4, More than space women want understanding and reassurance .

5, Most women feel that love is never having to ask for anything.

So we can see the biological differences which, unless tackled with care and uunderstanding can lead to major misunderstandings. Building Relationships is not an easy task and one should remember that to love and to be able to love is truly a gift , perhaps one of the best gifts of all. Like someone once said  - I would rather have relationships ,problems and  little or no money  than have lots of money,no problems and no relationships .

When we surround ourselves with a network of authentic relationships within which we are nurtured as well as nurture , we experience a security and a great joy that few achievements can equal. We derive our meaning and commitment in the service of these relationships and in keeping them through thick and thin.

I am not a cook

Yes friends, I am not a cook and not allowed to enter into the kitchen by my wife because she thinks I know nothing worthwhile but spoiling the settings. You know in my case the saying, ‘too many cooks spoil the chicken’, fails but makes it ‘A single cook like me can spoil the kitchen’.

However, I am good at other things related to food, its taste and presentation and for this purpose, I am sure I do not need to be a good cook or even a bad cook for that matter. You know while it comes to judge the food, our eyes work before our taste buds because the taste of the food is half judged just by looking at it. Moreover, this is true that this rule is worth following even in domestic presentation/setting the table apart from while serving/preparing for the guests. 

There are a certain points, which always make the presentation better like never set the table full of dishes at a time to make it confusing. This is also not advisable to set the table unplanned with dishes of different kinds at a place. There is no use keeping Ice cream, desserts, sweets, starters and main course at the same time, this would only create confusion nothing else. Possibly the guests would be detracted and would loose the interest without enjoying your preparations fully. 

Serve the small portions at a time

This is one of the best ways and attracts the attention of your guests towards the preparations you took so much pain to make food tasty. Suppose you present butter chicken in two different parts, nuggets and gravy to make your guests enjoy the preparation better. This is always more attention catching if you serve ingredients separately for garnishing. Please take care to serve freshly cooked food or food items for a better flavor and taste, food smelling foul may spoil the idea as a whole.

Salad is a big attraction

Salad is one item that makes your table attractive and can add to attraction even if you might have served any number of other tasty dishes. Tastefully decorated tray of salads not only plays a major role in giving your dining table a great look but the contents of the same being rich in starch and protein attracts your guests as well. You can always select a particular theme or a particular symmetry, while garnishing the salads. Have you ever tried separating the rings of round cut onions or decorating different items in different rows on place of mixing them! However, one thing is sure a show spoiler- simply cutting the ingredients and put them in the salads tray without giving them a proper look. 

Food must have its natural color

I know people like to serve colorful foods to their guests and I don’t think there is any harm as long as the food has its natural color. This is advisable to use ingredients, which have their own natural colors as using artificial colors may spoil both the taste and looks. You can always keep your menu balanced and different to provide enough colors to your presentation. Similar looking dishes would only confuse your guests and make no sense.

Utility is the best creativity

You can make many experiments while preparing the table for your guests but some of such experiments may distract your guests in place of attracting them. You can always make experiments within a limit of the taste of your guests. For instance if you have planned to serve Nan or Chapatti in a different shape, go ahead and do it but in case you kept them in shape of an airplane while presenting them to your guests, half of them would never care to look at them. So be very careful and make your party a big success.

Disclaimer-

I am not a cook