A kid thinks his own way after a certain age
A kid is like a blank paper where you, the parents write his future as per your wishes but you can write it up to a certain age of your child. The matters take turns as soon as the kids enter into their preteens when they begin to think their own way and start writing their own stories. In this particular stage parents can only guide their kids to write better stories but cannot erase the stories written by their wards nor can dismiss them entirely to rewrite them from a new angle all over again. Parents can only make corrections in the plans of their kids to guide them to ‘destination of successes’.
Facts are different
Teenage is full of challenges not only for children but for parents as well, a child of fifteen may think different from what you think about his future as the children today are in a different situation and can see a wider canvass of things to happen for themselves for their future. Teenagers today have many sources to know about future planning compared to kids a couple of decades back. A kid of fifteen may look different from time to time to their parents in certain manners like his way of talking, dress sense, mannerism, style and looks, etc because he is getting ideas from different sources and trying to experiment them all. This is a common issue faced by almost every family because the ways of thinking of a fifteen year old are certainly different from a parent in age group of 45 or around. This is the point you must tackle very carefully to avoid a complex situation for both of you, you and your teenage child.
This is age of dreaming
Preteens is the period when a child gets most influenced by the society around him beside the whole horizon spread open in front of him. Now this is up to you and your guidance, how he adapts situations to his best advantages. There is another fact that preteens is not only his mental and physiological growth age but physical as well when he gets inspired with so many developments around him and gets tons of new ideas every day.
And this is supposed to be the time, when your child becomes a positive or negative thinker and you as a parent have a major role to play in this process, without visibly involving yourself too deeply. I said visibly because there are certain other forces which influence your child in this particular age like his friends who come from different circles of society, lifestyle he sees around, TV is one big trendsetter and of course, internet is another prime source of information and influences these days with easy access.
Fashion inspires to do differently
And I do not have dressing sense as only fashion here but everything that counts with changing trends make an impact on the mind of a teenager. He wants to walk, talk, dress or even smoke for the sake of fashion and according to trends going around him. He learns them from different sources. You must know the fact that most children think that smoking or drinking is in vogue and if he does not drink or smoke he shall be considered as ‘old fashioned’, so he does it for the sake of staying trendy. Therefore the role of parents, family members and teachers is significant in upbringing of a child to let him know about what is right and what is not for him. However, this all should be in a very friendly manner and not looking as aggressive or forced upon him which may affect adversely.
Films and electronic media have big say
It is a proven fact that films and TV have a big influence on children especially teenagers allover the world with models and film stars, serial artists etc being there ideals to great extent. Children want to follow their footsteps in dressing, hairstyle, stunts, smoking habits, drinking, and lifestyle, how they walk or talk with girls. Do you remember the way children jumped down from their roofs after watching a popular Hindi serial trying to copy the fiction hero?
Children consider everything shown on silver screen or television as true and try to emulate it therefore this is your duty to tell them the difference in between facts and fiction to guide them the right way. Children are in a world of exposure where they see so many things, perhaps not right for their age and they begin to premature with possibilities of such information leading them towards unhappy situations. To keep your child away from such situations you should teach him the difference of right and wrong preventing him from doing such acts directly might not prove as effective as you explaining things in a friendly manner.
Friends and schoolmates are important
In his school your child comes across with different children belonging to different income group, lifestyle, communities and social status. Some of them from real luxurious classes impress them to great extent and your child wants to follow them which may create complex situations because every parent cannot provide such facilities to their children. To cut a long story short, I must make it clear that your child learns a lot in school and that is not limited to course related or studies but other fields of life as well.
You must keep a proper watch
Computers, television and internet has changed the world of children, these have big impact on behavior of your children up to the extent that sometimes they forget the ways to behave with their elders but that is where your role comes into play, keep them under control. Teenagers need a proper control on their behavior, they should neither be over controlled in which stage they will not share their problems with you nor become over bold to speak in a bad manner. They must learn to accept their faults and improve upon them.
Plus two stage is the time when most children become worried about their future and most of them want to select their favorite hobbies as their careers without knowing about their respective potentials and some of them also take inspirations from their friends and follow their career paths. But you should guide your child in this matter as much as possible according to his interests, merits and abilities because no one knows him more than you do in this particular matter. Children should know that selecting a wrong career path at this stage would harm their future forever.
Parents involved with their children on regular basis certainly have a plus point when dealing with them at this particular point because children do not feel uncomfortable talking to their parents who keep a regular conversation with them. Most parents who interact comfortably with their children on other subjects find it easy to know about their children’ plans for future and can help them in a better way.
Conclusion
Most teenaged children share their secrets with friends and spend more time with them, which sometimes hurts the ego of their parents therefore to avoid such situation you must keep your child in your confidence because no one but parents can help, support and love their children most. Parents also should not refuse but try to understand needs of their children.