Fantastic. Especially, "Forgive your enemy. But remember the Bastard's name."

I will go for #4, I wish I could shoot them at first site :)

Anyhow in general i liked all. It made me laugh like hell.

All five are true but put very humourously

They have a lot of truth in them, there are times when we try to be diplomatic about things while seething inside...# 3 has happened to me so many times and I still find it difficult to turn them away knowing fully well that the moment they get what they want they will not bother to know whether I am dead or alive ...

True. All of them carry a message we can't deny..Out of helplessness and fear of punishment by the law we suppress them. This, helplessness  the author put in an explosive humorous way.

So true ! our life is so unpredictable..

Picture depicted in a humorous way. One man is about to fall in a drain. The point is driven home in an effective way.

Nice post. All these points are great truths that happen in our real life, but we seldom notice the humor behind them until some creative people reveal it.

Saying ordinary day to day happenings in an extraordinary way with pinch of laughter evoking element is the hallmark of humor.