Self-reliance is the most important thing to lead a life of fulfillment and happiness. A man should be capable enough to solve his problems on his own. The problem is not outside but its within you that perceives the outside situations and circumstances as a problem. You may not be able to choose the external circumstances but how you react to it is a matter of choice. Author 'James Allen', in his wonderful masterpiece of a book 'As a Man Thinketh' says it best when he said, "circumstances doesn't make a man, they only reveal him to himself."
There may be times when situations seem insurmountably difficult. You may feel like a piece of straw in a hurricane, moving through life without any control or purpose. Chances are things seems overwhelming just because you are focusing all your attention on the wrong things, things that are out of your control. You can do nothing about it. The only wise thing you can do here is change your focus and perspective. Instead of worrying about something that is beyond your power to change, like a natural disaster, death of a loved one or any other such situations, focus all your attention and energy on how you react to those situations.
The only thing you can truly control in this world is your mind. This is the secret of your greatest strength. Use its full potential to shape your destiny. Anne Frank, a teenage girl, when hiding in her father's annex from Germans, was miserable because of the despair and unhappiness all around her. But one day she got the epiphany that she is unhappy because she chose to. She was unhappy because of her perception of the situation. It was in this moment that she realized she has the power to change her perception. And from that day onwards she chose to be happy.
If you let your happiness and peace of mind be dependent on external factors beyond your control, then chances are you may never become self-reliant. You will always be a slave to your circumstances and never know what it means to be truly free. If you think by achieving and hoarding superficial objects like luxury car, big house or a good job will make you happy, then you will be dissatisfied until you achieve them. Happiness and joy is not something abstract that you can achieve in the future. You can be happy now, in this very moment. All you have to do is choose to be happy.
"When life seems hard and you feel like you are surrounded by darkness, don't fight the darkness, just light a candle."