Some patients do deal with problems patiently while another group may emotionally attach themselves to the problems and respond in that way. It depends on each person’s personality and it can deeply influence his character, relations and even his success in career. An attractive personality helps one person to get easy attention, love and care from his family, co-workers, friends and society. It can increase both self respect and self confidence as well. Also, the positive energy it gives can help one person to go up each step of his success journey more easily and also helps him to develop and maintain healthy relationships with everyone far and near.
For personality development
First step is to know oneself better – both the positive and negative faces of your character, your abilities and weak points. Also, you need to know what else is needed for the improvement. You should be able to identify your positive inspirations as well as criticisms to move up one step further. If you are able to correct according to the criticisms taking them as positive points, no doubt, it’s a nice step. No need to change your character to attract others. It won’t work too long as wearing a new, strange face is just temporary. But if you are a person who is not able to develop new relations, then you should think about it seriously.
One should decide, ‘which factors should I change?’. If you get frequent advices from family members, friends or even strangers, never hesitate to check if they are right. For that, a self study is needed and slowly you can develop positive changes in your character. It’s true, it’s more difficult to change the character of an adult than a child. Child’s mind is just like wax which can be moulded to any desiring shape which is not at all an easy task with an adult’s mind. Sometimes, it may take years to adopt a new style of thinking, talking, approaching a similar situation in a new way etc. So, it’s better to start from simple things by changing small habits, later taking more tasks. For a person who spends a lot of time worrying, thinking about unnecessary things, it’s better to decide, “I won’t spend more than half an hour daily for such thoughts” than determining fully, not to worry at all. When this target is achieved and your mind has adjusted the change, carry forward that decision one step further reducing that thinking hours from half hour to 15 minutes. As it’s told, ‘slow and steady wins the race’, slowly he will reach the goal. The pleasure attained by your mind at this level is a kind of satisfaction and self confidence for your mind to meet more challenges of life. Also, if you set your targets very high far from your finger tips to reach, its failure attempts may prompt you not to try at all and slowly you may move away from the tasks.
It’s oneself who decides those tasks. Yet, you can seek opinion of your life partner or friends who know you near. Ask them to examine if they are seeing improvements in your attitude. A person who is near to us can access our mind easily, even our simple improvements of our character. Also, one can seek the help of a councilor, psychiatrist, books, personality development workshops etc.
Develop better skills of communication
For any field, to remain there and to attain success communication skill is an inevitable factor. First, know the person with whom you are interacting. Show patience to hear his views, ideas and opinions. Also accept its positive facts. Give him more opportunity to talk and ask questions. Use language fitting to his communication skills and knowledge rather than showing our skills. Also confirm yourself, if your ideas are reaching him through your words and body language. That’s why it’s told body language is very important. Facial expressions, gestures, eyes, body movement, sound pulse and its variations, touch etc can play an important role in getting a good impression about you. Even a sweet smile with little or a few words can touch the other person’s heart more easily than thousand words. Even if our ideas are good, if it’s not conveyed in a good way through our body language and expressions the other person may get a bad impression about you. A simple smile or occasional nodes when he talks make him feel that you are listening and that you are interested in his talks. Also, maintain good eye contacts while talking. Directly looking into someone’s eyes can increase your self confidence level and can also leave a good impression about you.
Stepping stones to personality development
Control habits
Very often, controlling your habits can give you good results in return. Choose dress codes most suited to the occasion. Avoid bad breath and maintain hygiene. Have complete and healthy diet. Exercise regularly and have good sleep. Yoga practices can also help you. Gradually developing such good habits can deeply influence your personality giving you more positive energy and a little more discipline in your life. Nail biting, putting fingers inside the nose, scratching hair and body parts – such habits show lack of self confidence while talking to a person and should be avoided at any cost.
Be a good listener
Though you are able to talk well, if you are not giving enough room for others to talk, you need more improvement. It’s good to help others by giving them information. Yet, if you are not willing to hear what he talks, will he make you his friend? Never! Instead of talking like a radio, make it a two way telephone talk. This will help you to know his interests and carry forward the communication in a better way. Also, never interrupt while he is talking. Be patient and try to become a good listener. You can clear your doubts too, by asking him questions suited to that situation. Pre-assuming his character, less attention to his talks and remaining quiet till he stops are also bad remarks. Never serve advices and solutions before hearing problems fully. Also, never fall under sensitive emotions like anger, jealousy, anxiety and despair while he is talking. It can transmit bad impulses and make him worry too.
Spend time wise and effectively
If you are able to complete a task within the time horizon, the self confidence, satisfaction and happiness you get back is really precious. If you are able to spend your time wisely, you can complete your targets without tensions. Isen Hover principle, Parato explanation, ABC technique etc are some of the common management time management techniques. Giving more importance to emergency task modules can often help you to use your time more effectively. In between, you can do some easy and interesting tasks to avoid boring created by some less interesting tasks. Use your best efficiency time for critical tasks while lazy hours for simple and less important jobs. The feeling that, I have completed some difficult and important modules itself can give you more confidence and less worries and tensions helping you to complete the remaining ones more effectively.
Just check, where you are spending more time and work on improving corresponding functions. Also, never give your assigned jobs to others for completion. It may develop a lazy habit inside you. But if needed, you can seek help from others without hesitation. Also, keep everything in your table neat and tidy. Also, arrange things in an orderly manner giving first preference to most important things. Never misplace anything carelessly because even searching an important file can take a lot of time from your pockets without any reason.
Easy solutions to difficult problems
If you are able to foresee problems of future, you can take precautions today itself. Prevention is always better than cure. Very often, you can solve your problems scientifically. Knowing the root cause of an issue is the first step towards its solution. Thus you can determine its present situations and changes if required. For a solution, prepare a chart consisting of both positive and negative problems and analyze each of them before taking a decision. You can include suggestions of both your family members and friends. For each suggestion, think both its positive and negative consequences which form the next step. After that, most useful, less complex, less time consuming, less problematic and more practical ways should be selected. Then collect things and gather information needed for its fulfillment. Also reassure if your selected path and solutions are feasible and practical. If your answer is no, then go for the second choice in the list and repeat everything as same.
New knowledge and new acquaintance
Attain every piece of latest information. It’s the gun powder to talk before everyone with confidence. Knowledge of different subjects can help you to make relations with persons of different tastes. Also, it gives more opportunities to make more friends. In return, you can know more about different subjects and helps you dealing with persons of different cultures and life style. Communicating with successive people can give you good principles to grow further. Also, keep distance from people with negative thoughts.
Expert opinion
You can seek an expert’s help if you are not able to achieve your own kept targets to overcome negative impulses of your character. Counselor, Psychiatrist and Psychologists can offer their timely help if needed. Through personality tests, it’s easy to know one’s character and personality and it helps to clear the negative points more easily. Also, a psychologist can give good advices too. To overcome anger, anxiety, shyness, denial of criticisms etc an expert opinion can help you a lot. To keep yourself away from bad thoughts and increase your confidence level, psychotherapies like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy are also available now. Depression, anxiety etc may need medical aid which should
never be avoided.
Never give up self confidence
The most important factor is our self confidence. So, at any stage never lose your self confidence or self respect. Instead seeing what treasures you already have feel yourself that you are lucky. It you try to catch unachievable targets, it may result in despair and feeling that you are unlucky and that you are a less important person. Never lose your self respect at any circumstance. Be humble in your talks. Yet never feel or make others feel that you are a less important person. God has given everyone some talent. Finding them and choosing right paths at right time can help you reach your dream world if you are willing to work hard. Instead of thinking about the bad incidents and experiences of your past, better concentrate your mind to the next bright day morning and dreams to achieve.
Through this article, I have given some simple points about personality development. Hoping it will help you at least a little bit.