Ten long years I lived with the dream that   I will be once yours , yours only . These years I have spent looking at the open window of your room , watching at your shade going here and there in the room behind the long curtain . The long white curtain , I can’t tell you how many times I have imagined of tearing it !

What you can I say , It was love . I was in love with you . I don’t know when did I realised that I can’t live without you . It may be when I was in the school . You studied biology than , you were in the college than right? You were so handsome then. Next year when I went to college I couldn’t believe to my eyes . The girls , you can say those bad girls running after you , I was so jealous ! I was like burning inside . I was living with the fear that someday someone will steal you from me . I felt like you were mine , mine only . I was feeling like killing myself .

“No,” I thought , “ It’s too much . I can’t bear all these silently. I have to do something . I have to get closure to him . Or else all my dreams will be shattered .” I told to myself .

I went near you in the college . My heart was beating fast . I was sweating profusely . I tried to look in to his eyes . He looked back at me .

“ Do you want any help Neetu?” he asked.

Neetu , yes this is the name you use to call me from our childhood . You never called me Namita . But I loved the name you have given to me . It was like a sweet music to my ears . I stood dumb . I was not there . I was remembering the childhood days of us . I was so shy and you were very smart and intelligent . You knew how to talk to people , and how to impress them .

“ Neetu , what happened? Anything wrong?” he was asking .

I didn’t knew what to say . I stood silently .

Then some girls came rushing towards you . And in no time they were around you like ants , as if they will eat you up like a cube of sugar in no time .

“ Neetu . let me introduce you to some one .” He too the hand of some girl . She was very beautiful . I knew something is going to be wrong with me . He took her hand in his and said , “ I love her , she is Rupa .” He said smiling .

I was shattered in to pieces within me . I was like dying .

“ This can’t happen, this can’t happen---------.” I was repeating within myself .

“And who is this girl?” Rupa asked looking at me .

“ She is my neighbour . You can say we are childhood friends .” He said

“ What? only neighbour ! You are not my neighbour only dear . You are my life .How can ------ you----.” I was about to burst in to tears .

You left the place with your girl friend . I was standing there silently , looking at the college door where you just passed with your girlfriend . I didn’t knew how to console myself .

Days passed . I don’t know what happened to your love story . But I couldn’t stop myself loving you . I love you more than before . My parents searched a suitable candidate for my marriage . I couldn’t deny . I had no reasons to do so . So I agreed .

I have talked to Manish so many times . He is gentle and loving . He is a software engineer . After marriage I will leave this place and will go to USA where he is settled .

Tomorrow is my marriage and why you have sent a letter to me . What you have written in this letter ? That you are going marry your love ! Marry her and live happily . I will never let you know that I loved you . Since I am going to a new life I will never read this one ands spoil the happiness that Manish has give to me .

The Unread letter written was like this,

Dear Neetu,

I don’t know From where to start . It took me long to realise that I don’t love Rupa . I was not happy with her . Why I don’t know . But slowly I realised that I was missing someone in my life . It is you Neetu. I can’t live without you . You can’t marry some other man . Please come back to me . I am waiting for you . We will leave this place forever . And let me tell you “ I LOVE YOU”. I am waiting for you in the station At 7 in the evening .

Prakash

I got married and the letter was never read by any one .