4th November update

samrat says we will celebrate diwali in a specially way this time. Gunjan says that he told her that he want help from her side from diwali. Sammy says yes but Gunjan says there are so many people here..Sammy says party hai so there must be people i didn’t told you cause if i did you wouldnt come Guru samrat knew this is experiment 2 to make you feel more confident there was not a better way then this to do that. Now you can get interact with these people don’t worry mein hoon na. Gunjan ask what am i supposed to do there is nothing here na rangoli, no dia no pooja. Sammy says there is pooja and calls a girls name. Gunjan says im not talking about her but about laksmi ji ka pooja. Sammy is confused Gunjan says i mean aarti..bhagwan ki aarti and then samrat gets it and says if i knew all this then i wouldnt have asked your help. An dthen that pooja comes(the girl) and sammy says gunjan will learn you rangooli today..and she says ok and goes away then bhenji comes wiht pooja(the other pooja not girl)and sammy says you have to do te pooja after rangooli cause we don’t know how to do it.
..
Nupur and mayanks mom are laughing and then mayank comes with chai and both stop laughing mayanks mom say i will come you to talk. Mayank ask nupur kya hua. Nupur says kya hua? Mayank says acha nak se chup kyun hogahie? when i was not here you were laughing. Nupur says you are looking nice. Mayank says i know tell something new.....Nupur says tum pehle se kam khadoos lakte ho. Mayank says pata hai you don’t look less then a film heroin.. Nupur say sreally gunjan told same thing..she said i looked like madhuri dixit what do you think who do i look like say a good name. Mayank smiles gets up and says I’m going to see mom

Gunjan says how can i teach this girl how can i talk to her and then she just go to pooja and ask her is she want to help her with rangooli. Pooja says yes sure why not. Another girl says to gunjan wow your dress is soo preatty. Gunjan says shukriya my sister has designed Sammy sees this and smiles...Gunjan and some other girls are making rangooli..some of the girls go to get something and then samy comes and sit next to gunjan and says nice he says if here was a bit more red color then it would look better gunjan says to lagado sammy saya laga doe gunjan says yes he comes closer and says sure?? gunjan gets a bit uncomfortable and says yes sammy comes closer and says laga doe gunjan says yes again and he puts red rang on her nose. Sammy says laga to diya. Sammy says you are great friend you are doing better them my expectations thanks for trusting me and they both smile......

Nupur is drinking tea with her biscuit and put biscuit and chai mayank and his moms look at each other and smile. Nupur sees it and then she says my grandma told if you do this then chai will be better. Mayank says nupur you ahev always a explanation for your harkat..how? Nupur says i was praising you tea! tum kitne karwi bate karo but you didn’t forgot to put cheeni in your tea and they start!!..Mayank moms stop them and says...i know you are beginning a booking match! mayur says CJ says same thing and they all start laughing..mayanks mom says that mayank can cook good too mayanks says thanks mom ..i make dinner on Monday, Wednesday and Friday mayanks mom say and on Thursday and Friday i make the food. Nupur ask friday? Mayank says we go out but if you are forcing you can make it. Nupur says i can’t cook and son and mother get shocked...

G is decorating the house and sammy comes and says chasmish get ready for the real test Gunjan ask asli test? sammy goes. and some other guy comes and ask gunjan of he can help her. Gunjan looks at sammy and want to walk away but sammy says no with his finger. The uy says give me some work too. She gaves him something and says to put it at the door. The guy comes back and ask something else? G says no..the guy walk away and Gunjan says lambe wale bhai.....and he comes back she says can you pleas ebut this table and chairs outside he says ok. Everyone starts helping gunjan and sammy take the same chair and their hands touch and they look at each other...

Nupur and M moms are making rangooli and mayank makes points for his project and mom helps him and they start talking about serial and women place it was about project but m moms and nupur go another way and then nupur says that fashion is changing in morena becaus eof this serial. Mayank says great point we can see opinion from 2 sides bare shaher and small city ka audience. M moms says you 2 have same ideas hoep ke milti hai but it can still become flop. Nupur says no we really enjoy while making project.

Samrat has changed his clothes and comes downstairs and goes to gunjan and says Happy diwali. G says Happy diwali. Sammy turns around and G want to say something. Sammy says if you want to say something then say it. G says how did you knew that i wanted to say something. He says eyes..eyes are just open book he puts gunjans bril a bit down and says im only interested in eyes book..bolo. G says your clothes are looking really weird its diwali today and asli diwali maza hindustani clothes mein hai not in jeans..Sammy says apka hokum sar akho mein.
Mayank ask why are you silent if you knew before what then?? Nuour says then i would give you more ideas first i was following you. Mayanks mom come and says is budhu ke kehne par. Nupur ask budhu? whole college say mayank. M moms says you have an own nazaariya too just show your ideas to people then ook what will happen mayanks showed me your report it was good.

Sammy has changed his clothes and comes

Precap: Everyone is dancing except Gunjan

6th November update...

Everyone is waiting for gunjan to sing. Gunjan is in tears and want to run away but then samrat comes in front of her and he is smiling and looks at Dia and give a look like was not good what ya did and the light go off and Sammy starts playing guitar and light gets on and Sammy starts dancing and dia mayur and all start too. Gunjan just look at them and smiles. (They dance on the song salaame salaame from dhoom).

Gunur are in their room and look outside to firework. Gunjan says that she thought she will have only fun in morena with diwali but it was amazing today too. Nupur agrees and says that it was even better than morena. Gunjan ask if she has a lot fun in mayanks house? and nupur says allot and tells it and then about mayanks mom and that she thought for a minute that it was not mayanks mom but her mom and they both get emotional scene but gunjan change the topic and start talking about the party. Nupur says tumhara samrat tumhare ghane ke situation ko achi tara se sambhala . Gunjan ask meri samrat??? Nupur says uff mein bas esi baat karahi thi..you name should haev been chacha chodori kyunku tum mujha har bat par pakarti he but i didn’t one think i thought that mayank was pakroo boring and all but he is not that bad. Gunjan says you dont feel good because mayank is no saroe? Nupur says tu bhi na ..he is not a saroe thats why i feel bad about hidden the truth about project. Gunjan says you started to work on your project by yourself na...............

Dia convo uday about the surprise!! and why samrat hasn’t give it to her. Uday says there was no surprise.

Nupur shows gunjan the gift mayanks mom has given her. And nupur says that she made a big mistake to lie about project and i have to solve this lie......

Uday says i mean there was no surprise today. Samrat must known that you were waiting for surprise that why he have postponed the surprise. Dia believes him.....

Myank is playing outside with the children and thinks about nupur and nupur looks at the gift of mayanks mom( a bhagwan) Dia thinking about surprise. Samrat is at home and walks and then he he sees the rangooli ..Gunjan is thinking about samrat.....

Mayanks mom calls mayu get up otherwise you will be late for college. Mayank gets up and goes to his mom and says you were calling me mayu for nupur too??..what will she think..M moms says oh yeah now i have to think every time what nupur will be thinking..mayank ask why she talks like that every time M moms says cause mera betha is tarah se hua hai from the time he met nupur. My son went to a party last time can you believe it. Mayank says that he enjoyed the party. M moms says that she enjoyed too and that nupur is cute. Mayank says that she is pagal. M moms say the note you have me were really like to the point and like it was really thought about it looks like 2 different nupurs..Mayank get confused......
.That pooja girl is talking to samrat at college and says that she was not able to sleep last night cause he can every time infront of her..Gunjan comes to samrat and samrat says to that girl phir miltehai. He says hey chashmish kaise yaad kiya she say mein mein..he say why are you so scared propose karna hai kya. G says nooo i wanted to say thank u for helping me last night in the party. Sammy says we talked about you singing in talent parade not in the party that why. Gunjan says for that thank u. Sammy says your welcome. He turns around and gunjan still want to say something and he knows that and turn again. Gunjan says i will try for sure. He ask for what? are you ok did someone say something? Gunjan says i want to tell you something..sammy wana say something but gunjan says please let me first. I wanted to say that i will sing in talent parade....for you and for ya mehnat and they both smile. But tum mere saat donge na. Sammy says mein tumhare saath hoon chasmish. Gunjan says that she needs help from him to sing infront of audience. He says dont worry i have a plan if i tell maza nahi ayenga.
smmy says dia i told you na that i will win this bet. Now excel college will see that samrat can make impossible ..possible but for that we haev to wait till talent parade..Samrat tum aise rocking kaise ho sakte ho.....
Precape: Mayank tellss Cj that he read nupurs note but didn’t look like hers.. Samrat says to Dia that gunjan will sing in talent parade..dia says don’t talk about her let’s talk about use.. Sammy says i can’t think about something else from the time we bet..

#Idontremember

Good morning, all and a Happy Republic Day! Go watch the parade NOW and humor me with some pretentious patriotism.

Today is a dry day. And I didn't stock up last night so all I'm having right now is a cup of regular coffee. By now, you must've guessed my trade secret, that which keeps the funnies rolling at a steady pace (sometimes when the drink is REALLY spiked, I do ridiculously detailed analyses of gibberish and actually make sense out of it) My point is, today I have lesser lols to give to the world, so I'm going to start with some irrelevant observational humor, which I should've written last week.

Did anyone notice the shirt Rannvijay was wearing last week during the pool task where a brick was submerged in water and the Roadies had to submerge themselves and play underwater tetris. And then he wore a different colored but similar one this week during Behind The Scenes. You know, the one that says 'Submerge says dance'. If Nikhil has been handing out those around the office then I, sir, have been gypped. And since I am pretty sure you come here when you have no other place to be on the internet, Nikhil, I mentioned Submerge, four times in this paragraph. With a probability of 336,884 people reading this thread at least once, that's over 1.3 crore impressions of your brand. At industry norm CPM rates that equates to several lakh rupees but I'm a generous advertiser so I'll accomodate. In summary, gimme a t-shirt!!

EDIT: Wow, that was unfunnier than I thought it'd be in my head.

Let's just get on with the review and hope for the lols. You tell me when you do.

EDIT: I should have just written about my dog taking a shit on the floor. Funnier still

This week, the Roadies travelled from Kannur to Calicut (Kozhikode, and it's Koyhi-kode not Kozee-kode) and the episode started with some mush which seemed really odd, because a) It was so abrupt and didn't match the tone of the rest of the episode b) The angle wasn't developed or even referenced again in the episode. I am guessing they would in episodes to come. Nevertheless, is it just me or does someone smell lust? Fair enough. Or the only lust we would've seen this year would've been Vikas kissing the ground every 20 seconds. Mohit, still proud, beta. I picked you on Battleground exactly because I wanted you to get on the show eventually and be the well hung stud that you are. Good on ya! Eric, the girly screams apart, you ain't doing too bad yourself. Stop squirming like a 13 year old girl and you're set.

The money task between the Green Mambas and the Re...

Hey! Brainfart! I am going to include two questions in each review and whoever answers both first gets brownie points, if you collect enough over the course of the season you can later redeem them for drugs, sex and consumer electronics goods.

So anyway, the task was to build rafts, paddle across a stream and break a matka on the other side of the shore. Certain visuals during the task brought back memories of Seasons 1 and 2 of Lost (which btw you ABSOLUTELY MUST WATCH and IS RETURNING on Feb 2!!) and the Red Indians won the task after Vikas FALCON PAWNCHed the matka.  - Look up 'When Falcon Punches Collide' on YouTube] I missed out on him saying addrenalund as noted by Darwin on his review, so can someone tell me if the last part of the word was bleeped? If not, way to stick it to the censors, MTV! As sexy as a A-choot-anandan.

When I saw the previews last week, I thought the pungi task was actually much worse. Think of it as a sequel to the ball-busting task from last year, and you'll get the idea. However, getting your nipple twisted through electrical means is no joke either.

EDIT: BTW how many of you remembered Hello Brother when you heard pungi? The movie has it's moments and is grossly underrated, if after 10 years I remember names like Officer Padode, Havaldar Hatela and of course, Ninja Chacha then it sure had to be good.

So after numerous PT routines and several painful 'N'ipple 'S'hocks (It's ok, if you didn't get that one) the episode ended with the Mambas winning immunity and that which I have been waiting to see on the show for a while now! Enough pussied out content and jockblocking, FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!

Preface

Apologies for missing out the previous episode, I was watching the show when suddenly I became deaf, I tried changing my hearing aid battery and in this process I missed out most parts of the episode, later I found out that it was a technical problem from the channel itself :|

But nothing could stop me from writing this synopsis, not even my tremblinng handdsss…

Introduction

Vikas was back inspite of being voted out and 2 seconds post coming back he sits down on his knees and says ”Ye show mera sab kuch hai” :|
So we are not done with his antiques yet :p

Last week’s fire and water task concluded in Meghna being voted out from the race, Vikas managed to complete both the tasks and earn immunity as a token of his unique display of stupidity!

Today’s episode’s teaser makes me think to what extent is a human willing to bear pain in order to survive this race? The teaser is shocking and the game has just turned tougher than ever before!

It was yet another lazy Sunday; I woke up at 1pm still feeling sleepy while my doggy greeted me good morning with his thick tongue running all over my face and by the time I had stoop up, he was done licking my arms to perfection.

My day had started and my tea was cold.
So I woke up from the bed, brushed my teeth, had my breakfast and medicine, and sat down on my porch with the newspaper only to learn that it was Sunday – the day when Darwin unleashes his Dar-view-nism in the community!
*Background sound effects – Tan tan ta daaaaaannnnnnnnnn!*

But there sat my doggy with his shining eyes, reminding me to clean his poo and give him lunch before I start with my Sunday stupidity yet again :|
By evening I was done with all the household chores and relaxed on my Rocking chair to watch Roadies!

Chapter I – ‘Row’dies!

*Sunrise*
Knock Knock!
*An un-brushed Ravneet opens the door to receive a Yahoo Scroll*
It said they have to get ready and reach to the next destination – Calicut.
While on the journey, I brushed my studies on Laws of Attraction as fellow Roadies claimed that Mohit and Charlie are in ahun ahun! And Anwar and Mannat are in ahem! Uham!!

Journey continues and they reach Calicut where Roadies receive another scroll asking them to get ready for their next task and meet Rannvijay on the shore of some nearby stream.

Once on the shore, Rannvijay tells them that they would be competing for money.
Both the Green Mambas and Red Indians would be provided with some tires and bamboos with the help of which they have to make a raft and use it to reach to the other side of the shore where a pot in hung onto a tree.
Once they’ve reached, Roadies have to break open the pot by climbing on to the tree using the same raft that they had built. They cannot touch the tree while climbing and the team to complete the task first will win Rs. 50,000.

Vikas was happy as this time the bamboo was not being used on him
So the task began and Red Indians took the lead, they had crossed half way already while Green Mambas were trying their best to keep their raft afloat.

Finally they let realized that not being straight is now legal (no pun intended).
So they flipped their raft upside down and slowly started drifting towards the deeper water. By this time Red Indians were tired and wanted some rest but then something happened to them as I could hear Vikas narrate: “Suddenly hamara addrenalund standard bauhat upar chale gaya”s  and they rowed towards the shore with full force.

Finally, the Red Indians had reached the shore and Vikas climbed the raft to break his hand…. Err… pot to win the task.
Red Indians had won the task and earned Rs. 50,000 while Green Mambas were playing splash mid way on the stream.

Chapter II – Survival of the Fittest

Next day, Roadies receive a scroll asking them to come to the hotel near some kalabu theatre.

As they reach there, Roadies encounter a white bunny who wore a black face mask and a white hat. He says that he’s a fitness trainer named ‘Ravindranath’ and has come here to teach them P.T
In my 80 years of experience I have never come across another bunny who could teach P.T.  So I decided to study this subject.
I went close to the TV set and observed that this bunny was partially human!
WTF!! He had limbs and legs!! Never knew that one day we would be able to cross breed Human and Rabbits! I need to iterate my research and theories I guess :|

But later, as of now, I was busy watching bunny teaching P.T to the Roadies when they receive another scroll asking them to meet Rannvijay at the Hotel’s open ground.
By now my doggy had joined me as he had never seen such a rabbit before.

Chapter III – The real Physical Test!

Enter Roadies!
*Chairs, wires, bulbs, boxes, buttons are kept on the task location*
This is the first time I saw pain and fear in the eyes of the Roadies on meeting Rannvijay.
He explains them the task, which they have perform to win immunity.

3 boys from each tribe will sit on the chair and both their ears and nipples will be clipped to a wire reaching the box which contains the lever for activating the current.
The other 2 members will have to do steps that had been taught to them in the P.T class.
Rannvijay would be calling out random numbers Roadies will have to do the steps corresponding to the respective number.

There will be 3 rounds, in the 1st round; he would call out numbers from 1 to 4 and an incorrect step from a team member will result in one of their partners on chair receiving the shock for 1 second.
The 2nd round would have numbers from 4 to 8 and they would be shocked for 2 seconds for an incorrect step while the 3rd round would involve steps 1 to 8 and their partners would be shocked for 3 seconds for every incorrect step.

As a member make a mistake, one of the opponent team’s member has to come forward to give the shock. IF they fail to shock their opponent clearly then all the 3 members of their team would be shocked.

The team to receive maximum shocks in these 3 rounds loses while all members of the winning become immune.
Also, if anyone backs out from the task then that particular member would lose his/her immunity automatically.

From the Red team, Amritpal, Mohit and Zaid were tied to the chair while Vikas and Priyanka did the P.T and from the Green team Eric, Ameya and Anwar were tied while Ravneet and Charlie did those P.T steps.

So the task starts and Priyanka goofs up instantly. Amritpal inaugurates the shock receiving sessions followed by Zaid and Ameya.
I could hear a “Woof!” as Ameya received his first shock, that startled my doggy who haphazardly started searching the house thinking he finally has found a mate. I was saddened to inform him that his mate was a mammoth on TV

The second time Ameya woofed, my doggy ran away towards the door and peed around the corner marking his territory :|
Not bothering much about him I noticed a childish grin on Vikas’s face as he pulled the lever like a 5 year old who plays with his wooden horse.

By 2nd round almost everyone had received a shock and different kinds of expressions and noises were coming out from them.
I remember Eric saying “mnzzgaaaooooo!! Hooo hooo hooo hoo hooo”. No he wasn’t singing or happy that he’s in Roadies, that was his reaction to the shock which made my doggy pee once again – only this time on the other corner of the door :|

So all three rounds were over and the boys were relieved but wait! It was a tie!! And they had to play an additional round. Hearing this Vikas jumped with enthusiasm!!
Probably he wouldn’t have been so enthusiastic because if he were to be tied to the chair :p

Then, as everything was going normal, Vikas displayed his stupidity again! He failed to shock the opponent team properly and all three members of his team had to receive the shock

Tie breaker ended in another tie =)) But this time they result was to be announced based on a single mistake. One mistake would cost them the immunity. This was done by Priyanka and hence the Green Mambas were immune!

Conclusion

Today’s was the most painful episode of the season, it was not only a physical but a mental test as well, would rate this episode a 4/5. Would’ve given It 5/5 if we would’ve witnessed the vote out as well!

Next week we get to see some fight and some climbing task with traditional Indian task. A confusing but exciting trailer!

That’s all from me for today! This is Darwin saying Sayonara, thanks for reading Daw-view-nism!

*”Shit! I stepped in it!! Oye!! Salle yahan bhi mootha tha!!!!! kahan gayaaa ”*