Lonely child

You should be careful if you have only child in your family because he may feel lonely and bored. He also develop some bad habits, which you may not find serious but may turn later into behavior problems! These problem become a little more complex for working couples or the problems get little more complex while your child feels alone when he comes back home from school to find himself alone or in care of domestic help. You can solve your problem taking a few things in to account.  

Most parents make certain mistakes during parenting those lead children to behavioral problems and you would be surprised to know that these are not big steps to correct such problems. You should follow these advices so that your child remains healthy, fit and happy.  

Your child may mature earlier than he should

You should make him feel that he is being looked after properly because the feeling of loneliness may make him insecure in case he realizes that there is no one to take his proper care and he is all alone at work, play and studies. You must reassure him that he is not alone and every one in the family cares for him even if they are not with him all the time. He needs to secure psychologically that would keep him in good mental condition.   

Problems with a lonely child

Most nuclear families are facing one common problem today and that of a lonely child in the family and this is becoming a big problem with increasing number of such families. Most couples do not want more than one child in their families due to various reasons and being in job, the number of children remains limited to one per family.

A lonely child is lesser friendly

A lonely child becomes either too serious or too naughty since they do not become friendly easily as they feel too possessive. They generally never share their belongings with any one with a feeling of ‘me’ only. That is natural taking into account their physiological condition, which does not permit them to think in ‘we’ as they do not know about it. They either fight with other children who try to enter into their homes or try to fight with them considering them as intruders. 

The lonely child does not share his belongings

That is another problem with lonely child because he thinks in terms of ‘me’ for him others does not exist. He wants to keep every thing for himself and sharing his belongings with others and those ‘others’ may include you as well. They hardly accept advices coming from other sources as they find them interference in their territory. This complex situation needs to be solved with lot of patience.

Teach him culture and traditions

Children find the matters related to culture and traditions interesting if told in an interesting way. Tell him about your ancestors and their achievements to make him interested for doing some thing similar, which your forefathers did to make your family proud. He should learn your family traditions to keep them alive and going. This would make him feel assured about your companionship while you sit with him and his participation in interesting conversation.

Do not punish him for small mistakes

The punishments make a child stubborn and behave rather differently especially while these are too frequently. While once for a change makes him feel your authority, doing it on regular basis makes him careless and depressed. Children who face such punishments often do not take them seriously although they feel tensed and prefer to stay alone.

Do not feel guilty

Never show and feel guilty in front of your child that shows your disappointment regarding having an only child because your child also feels it and behaves more arrogantly. This is in your interest to assure him that he is your most loved one that matters most to you. You should take him in your full confidence without making him feel too proudly about it. Reassuring about your full support is enough.

Keep him busy

As they say an empty mind is devil’s workshop therefore keeping him busy in study, games, watching television or cleaning his belonging, making his bed properly, rearranging his belongings and conversing with him would keep him busy and interested. You can ask him to join a hobby class of his choice. He can go to swimming pool or read interesting books of his choice. You should find newer ways to keep him busy and engaged in interesting jobs that would develop his personality.

Insecurity

Insecurity is one big problem with a lonely child as only child needs lot of extra care as the parents find them unsecured taking full time care of him and when the child grows up he himself feels at the receiving end. In any case, child should not be made to feel unsecured as that can make serious problems in his behavior.

Never keep much focus on him 

If your child is exposed to over focus by you and other relatives for being a lonely child there are chances that he would expect more because he gets used to it. In case, he finds ignored even once that shakes him beyond your imagination and that can distort his personality and make serious behavioral problems. The best way to teach him right is to never fulfill his demands at his command but let him earn them. Show yourself available but not as per his demands but as per his needs.

Friends are important for him

Children need friends because for them expressing themselves is one of the easiest way of showing their happiness and that is more true for lonely child as he has no many people around to share his feelings, his happiness. If you find that you child is shy or arrogant who does not want to mix-up easily, you should have to come forward to help select him few friends who will make him comfortable. Tell him in a positive manner that spending some time with friends would make him feel good and help make him smarter. To look smarter and up to the expectations would make him interested and he would gain some positive attitude.

Conclusion of my effort

Your child would need your help and support at every step at this stage in his life especially being a lonely child. The problem becomes more complex if your family is nuclear family, where the number of members is limited and if you are a working couple the need to handle the situation becomes your top priority as your carelessness in upbringing of your child may ruin his future as he may develop serious behavioral problems.

Photo source- wikipedia