Sibling Rivalry - is it a way of life or can it be avoided?

Right from the Ramayan and Mahabharat days we see brothers becoming rivals as they grow up....We see this happening all around us in many families esp after they get married and have their own families.I wonder if this a way of life or can it be avoided of care is taken by the parents and the siblings themselves...

Sibling rivalry is not a universal phenomenon. We see examples for both Rivalry and harmonious siblings.. Family conditions in which the siblings were brought up and the Harmony existed between the parents play a pivotal role in avoiding the rivalry or prolonging the rivalry.

It can be avoided by the pure love.

Right from the Ramayan and Mahabharat days we see brothers becoming rivals as they grow up....We see this happening all around us in many families esp after they get married and have their own families.I wonder if this a way of life or can it be avoided of care is taken by the parents and the siblings themselves...

Sibling rivalry is not a universal phenomenon. We see examples for both Rivalry and harmonious siblings.. Family conditions in which the siblings were brought up and the Harmony existed between the parents play a pivotal role in avoiding the rivalry or prolonging the rivalry.

In many families they may not show it but it is there, when children grow up it comes out in one form or the other.I see this happening more with men than with women though, may be because women are not actually given financial freedom to deal with the money or property.Almost all big industrialists have been having such problems..

It can be avoided by the pure love.

Possibly so, but many factors come in and people do get affected by other peoples ideas ..

It can be avoided by the pure love.

Possibly so, but many factors come in and people do get affected by other peoples ideas ..

To my mind it has a lot more to do with the culture of a family and the way children are brought up! I have come across fewer cases of such rivalry but the problem is very much there.

Right from the Ramayan and Mahabharat days we see brothers becoming rivals as they grow up....We see this happening all around us in many families esp after they get married and have their own families.I wonder if this a way of life or can it be avoided of care is taken by the parents and the siblings themselves...

Sibling rivalry is not a universal phenomenon. We see examples for both Rivalry and harmonious siblings.. Family conditions in which the siblings were brought up and the Harmony existed between the parents play a pivotal role in avoiding the rivalry or prolonging the rivalry.

In many families they may not show it but it is there, when children grow up it comes out in one form or the other.I see this happening more with men than with women though, may be because women are not actually given financial freedom to deal with the money or property.Almost all big industrialists have been having such problems..

Yes sibling rivalry is there. Its not fully absent. In Some families as you said will not be visible externally and it surfaces at an opportune time.

What I feel is that it is natural to have some amount of sibling rivalry at very young age especially if there is very less age gap between the children. They become rivals for the attention of their parents and others. But as they mature up, normally with proper parental care, that feeling should be replace by a feeling of love for each other. I feel that one of the way to prevent sibling rivalry is avoid making comparison among the children and appreciate each of them for who they are.

It can be avoided, by showing the same interest to all the children. When a new born needs more attention the elder one does not understand, so make them understand

Generally brothers are compared to each other by their parents and others. This creates rivalry and jealousy. The parents should avoiding such comparison.

Generally brothers are compared to each other by their parents and others. This creates rivalry and jealousy. The parents should avoiding such comparison.

Bang on,Sir! That's why I highlighted the cultural aspect of it!!
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Sibling Rivalry can be avoided in many ways but many of us don't do so. They prefer to dominate others and don't accept our fault if anything we have done so. Ego and jealousy gives rise to clash. This makes big family segment into many small families.

Sibling rivalry is very much present in most families, although it may become less and less apparent as the children grow up and become mature. But in families where the comparison is always there between children, in most families the child who does better at studies is given more affection and appreciated more while the child who is a little less than the other gets to hear about it all the time. This leads to jealousy and rivalry and is not a healthy sign. So it is actually the parents who can make a lot of difference to avoid this trait!

Sibling rivalry is most severe in few politicians family. Sons/daughters of great leader do terrific fights to capture authority.

As I read all the different responses I too feel that culture and home atmosphere has a lot to do with sibling rivalry and how bad it can get because I have seen some cases where brothers are ready to go to any extent to prove a point, which probably could have been avoided if parents were careful...

In tamilnadu, the current popular sibling rivalry is between the sons of Kalaignar Dr. M. Karunanidhi, Chief of DMK (Former Chief Minister of Tamilnadu) - Mr. Stalin & Mr. Azhagiri to become the chief of that party.

In tamilnadu, the current popular sibling rivalry is between the sons of Kalaignar Dr. M. Karunanidhi, Chief of DMK (Former Chief Minister of Tamilnadu) - Mr. Stalin & Mr. Azhagiri to become the chief of that party.

They are step sons and that makes a difference to a small extent, however one can only blame Karunanidhi for such problems and I am sure it is only going to get worse when their own children grow up and there is more power struggle..

In tamilnadu, the current popular sibling rivalry is between the sons of Kalaignar Dr. M. Karunanidhi, Chief of DMK (Former Chief Minister of Tamilnadu) - Mr. Stalin & Mr. Azhagiri to become the chief of that party.

They are step sons and that makes a difference to a small extent, however one can only blame Karunanidhi for such problems and I am sure it is only going to get worse when their own children grow up and there is more power struggle..

Well said Usha Manohar. As days go, issue is becoming more severer. Any one should give up or sacrifice. Otherwise there will be a severe quarrel which may in-turn lead to violence among their so called supporters.

Sibling rivalry is very much present in most families, although it may become less and less apparent as the children grow up and become mature. But in families where the comparison is always there between children, in most families the child who does better at studies is given more affection and appreciated more while the child who is a little less than the other gets to hear about it all the time. This leads to jealousy and rivalry and is not a healthy sign. So it is actually the parents who can make a lot of difference to avoid this trait!

I agree that parents are to blame to a great extent...we see so many parents being partial to sons and neglecting the daughters...But when there are more than one male children the situation becomes bad since boys take such things lying down ...

Sibling rivalry is very much present in most families, although it may become less and less apparent as the children grow up and become mature. But in families where the comparison is always there between children, in most families the child who does better at studies is given more affection and appreciated more while the child who is a little less than the other gets to hear about it all the time. This leads to jealousy and rivalry and is not a healthy sign. So it is actually the parents who can make a lot of difference to avoid this trait!

I agree that parents are to blame to a great extent...we see so many parents being partial to sons and neglecting the daughters...But when there are more than one male children the situation becomes bad since boys take such things lying down ...

Yes Usha that's true! In an all-male family, the struggle for power is much more intense and pronounced and usually the rivalry is also more than in a household which has sisters too! Boys have more ego issues than girls have, even at a very young age!

In tamilnadu, the current popular sibling rivalry is between the sons of Kalaignar Dr. M. Karunanidhi, Chief of DMK (Former Chief Minister of Tamilnadu) - Mr. Stalin & Mr. Azhagiri to become the chief of that party.

In Kerala, between film star com Tourism minister Ganeshan and his father Balakrishna pillai who has several times served our state as minister :cheer: