Is having a son a matter of life and death.

It is the peoples attitude that is at fault, from birth it is dinned into ones head that a woman is not complete or blessed unless she gives birth to a son, what a pity that even in this age and times people believe in such rubbish and go to the extent of giving up their life for such a silly reason..

It's mere madness and a foolish belief. "Naputrasya Gatirnaasti"' without son, there is no moksha. These beliefs are to be rubbished at the earliest. Indira Gandhi was the only daughter of Nehru. And she has ruled the country.

Some people still need to undergo change in thinking - why a son is important is because Hindu customs and ritual and certain rites are only carried out by a son and hence there is still a large group of people who want baby boys and not baby girls to carry forward their so called family name and do the last rites.

Mousumi Ghosh wrote:

Some people still need to undergo change in thinking - why a son is important is because Hindu customs and ritual and certain rites are only carried out by a son and hence there is still a large group of people who want baby boys and not baby girls to carry forward their so called family name and do the last rites.

 

Performing the last rights of parents is an exclusive domain for males, is nothing but a superstition. Presently, even women also performing the last rights. Thus breaking the myth.

In a family of average income and less education, parents, especially mothers, are worried about the difficulties for upbringing of their daughters and getting them married. In case of a son, there is nothing to bother about him; he will take care of himself and will care the parents. Such unhealthy thoughts may lead to severe depression and suicide.

It is the peoples attitude that is at fault, from birth it is dinned into ones head that a woman is not complete or blessed unless she gives birth to a son, what a pity that even in this age and times people believe in such rubbish and go to the extent of giving up their life for such a silly reason..

True...today with girls being presented with equal opportunities of education and livelihood, more and more women are taking care of their parents in old age, even in case of couples who do have sons but are abandoned by them, it is the daughters who look after them. Yet, the age old belief and mentality that only a son will enable you to reach heaven, is the cause of anguish for many.

RAMAKRISHNAN. A wrote:

In a family of average income and less education, parents, especially mothers, are worried about the difficulties for upbringing of their daughters and getting them married. In case of a son, there is nothing to bother about him; he will take care of himself and will care the parents. Such unhealthy thoughts may lead to severe depression and suicide.

 

The fault lies with the people's wrong beliefs which were deeply rooted in our lives since centuries. These should be uprooted.

I have no son but a daughter only and I think I am very much alive till date.

suni51 wrote:

I have no son but a daughter only and I think I am very much alive till date.

 

Sure you will be alive. Heaven is not going to fall on you. Nothing happened to Nehru, though he had only one daughter, who ruled the country.

rambabu wrote:

Mousumi Ghosh wrote:

Some people still need to undergo change in thinking - why a son is important is because Hindu customs and ritual and certain rites are only carried out by a son and hence there is still a large group of people who want baby boys and not baby girls to carry forward their so called family name and do the last rites.

 

Performing the last rights of parents is an exclusive domain for males, is nothing but a superstition. Presently, even women also performing the last rights. Thus breaking the myth.

Exactly, that is what I said people need to undergo a massive change in their thinking, girls are equally carrying out performing the last rites of their parents. But it will take time for this feeling to seep into a large group of people.

Mousumi Ghosh wrote:

rambabu wrote:

Mousumi Ghosh wrote:

Some people still need to undergo change in thinking - why a son is important is because Hindu customs and ritual and certain rites are only carried out by a son and hence there is still a large group of people who want baby boys and not baby girls to carry forward their so called family name and do the last rites.

 

Performing the last rights of parents is an exclusive domain for males, is nothing but a superstition. Presently, even women also performing the last rights. Thus breaking the myth.

Exactly, that is what I said people need to undergo a massive change in their thinking, girls are equally carrying out performing the last rites of their parents. But it will take time for this feeling to seep into a large group of people.

 

Yes. You said it in a general way. I quoted a particular case specifically,plaguing the society. There are a plethora of issues like this.

Performing last rights is equal to both son and daughter. Once upon a time it was believed that women will get tensed when they saw a burring body but they are now facing everything with confidence. I saw Some women who are doing the cremation duties as a business. 

Performing last rights is equal to both son and daughter. Once upon a time it was believed that women will get tensed when they saw a burring body but they are now facing everything with confidence. I saw Some women who are doing the cremation duties as a business.

A correction here for all, it is the last rites and not rights! Anyway, you are right, where once women shied away from such a spectacle as a cremation, now more and more women are seen performing the last rites of their parents. In fact, last week, there was an article in a leading Marathi daily about a group of women in rural Maharashtra who have been performing the last rites of those who have no legal heir and of the dead bodies of despondent people who are so often found lying on the streets. These women are doing it not for money or anything, but only because they feel it is their duty to do something right by the people who die lonely. A rather a noble example and a slap in the face of those who still claim that having a son is the only way to heaven.

So if change can be observed in rural areas, in cities too such change will follow suit, although it may take time.

Any change takes time before it becomes a norm, people frown at a change in the beginning. All the present societal norms were once frowned and heckled. Once the belief was that earth is flat.

I think Death and last rites are not the major concern of most of the parents; it is life that matters, the future life of their children. With the increasing humiliations against women, the human society frightens them, and the parents hope that their daughters are safe, and a few of them are inclined to think that they had a son instead of daughter. 

It all contributes to age old superstitions, which are not relevant to the ever changing world. One should go along with world.

So if change can be observed in rural areas, in cities too such change will follow suit, although it may take time.

True, it will indeed take time and education will certainly help in bringing about that change. But even in the educated people, many are still reluctant to give up the traditional beliefs.  I suspect that it is fear of letting women be more independent in taking decisions that is more at play here than the real concern for such beliefs.

Even among educated and so called evolved families you see this partiality for a male child. In our neighborhood there was a minor accdient in the nearby playground and a child got hurt , had a fractured hand . The mother was called and the first thing she said was thank god it is Smitha who got hurt and not Shreyas, my husband would kill me if anything happened to our son ....Such insensitivity coming from a mother ! I was truly disgusted by the woman's attitude !!!!!!