Compliments convey respect. Relationships are built on Respect.

Do you know the power of a cheering word? A cheering word sinks deep in to the man's heart. And this compliment showers benefits on you, continuously. Day in and day out. All along the year. And for many many years. We all know how a beautiful Quotation of great people will inspire us. We are aware, how many great people moulded their lives through a quote that fired them to the heights of glory and shoot like a meteor.

Why we should compliment

A compliment works like a  miracle when someone is consistently failing to achieve his goals, especially for novices because any setback may lead to quitting the job once and for all. But a positive feedback helps them gain normalcy and start working with renewed vigour. But it's an altogether different proposition with seasoned people. They are used to failures and setbacks. In fact, they don't need a positive feedback.A beginner will be the beneficiary of a Feedback because it makes him think that he's on the right track.

A compliment boosts the morale of children

Children always try to enter the domain of elders at the earliest. The underlying deep desire in a child to show his mettle and get a pat of appreciation from his parents is the dream of every child.Of course this is a genuine and just wish. It's up to the parents to act according to their child's interests.

In tune with this, a child should be given an occasional opportunity to do a small job like, fetching the news paper from the next door neighbour, Or allowing him to go and buy an eraser from the stationery shop opposite your home.

And, when he comes back triumphantly after completing the assigned job, compliment him profusely. You will not miss that spark of "Achievement" in his eyes. Do you know the consequences of this small gesture?

I too count

Your boy's elation touches new heights. Now he will be raring to learn new skills. The feeling that " I too count" was generated by your positive feedback that is how your compliment works.

Remember the parenting Mantra that was widely tested and trusted, "Catch them, while they are doing something good" should be followed lock stock and barrel

Compliments strengthen Relationships

Even your most antagonist will be melted with a compliment. But be aware that complimenting is not everybody's cup of tea. It needs humility.

Why some people compliment less?

We the humans always show orientation towards negativity. Of course there is a reason behind this negativity. The caveman had to develop this quality because of the insecure conditions around him and the hazardous life he lives. It's good to have negativity in one way. The negativity keeps us safe from risks. But at the same time the Negativity prevents us from seeing the really really good things around us and good deeds done by people around us.

The lapses of our servants draw our attention more easily than the impeccable services rendered by them.

Some people are shy

Some people have "Social Anxiety." It makes them shy to speak about a person's achievement in a complimentary way. But such people should know that complimenting profusely, a person's achievements with whole heart is the best way to banish their social anxiety. Such people should see Complimenting as a boon.

Some fear people may brand them as a "Brown noser" or a sycophant.

People who doesn't want to get labeled as sycophants can chose a way of complimenting their superiors when people are not around, But don't avoid complimenting altogether. And ensure that they should sound as sincere as possible.

How to get rid of our Negativity

It needs a conscious effort. First and foremost thing is to be aware of your own negativity. If you are aware you have the trait of Negativity in you, you will try to overcome it with a conscious effort. Of course you have to put extra effort to see the positivity aspect in others. Generally people with negativity characteristic will fail to see the best things which are lying under their very nose. This says about the influence of negativity on you. You are absorbed by negativity and became Self-centered.

A self-centered sees everything as a threat.

A self-centered person thinks that by paying compliment to a deserved person, he thinks he has become inferior and the other one who receives the compliment as  superior. They become too stingy when it comes to complimenting others.

This is the reason why self-centered people cannot have sound relationships.

What's the truth?

The truth is that only superior people will compliment a person endowed with superior virtues. If you go all the way to the stage and compliment the man on the dais. "Oh, that was a presentation boy. Where from you got those presentation skills?", you are really a superman.

How to give a compliment

There won't be single soul who doesn't have a praise worthy quality in him or her. But you have to be a bit curious. A bit investigative so that you can find a quality in him that was somewhat unique and never acknowledged by anybody.  It need not be a groundbreaking accomplishment. Even if you find a small spark, give an affectionate pat on the shoulder.. And see the glow of contentment in their countenances.

Take care you are specific.

A general compliment without being specific sounds stale and 'Routine.' While complimenting the artist while going through the exhibition of his paintings in the town hall say like this."Your Water colours are mind boggling. Especially the girl in her bridal attire is simply marvelous." This specificity says loud and clear that you are really a keen observer and the receiver feels the sincerety in you without an iota of doubt  and about your keenness

Let your compliment build trust on you

Insincerity peeps through sooner or later. If your compliment is found to be insincere by the receiver, the trust on you will be eroded and even sincere compliment too will be viewed with suspicion in future. And it goes without saying such relations will not last.

 No Backhanded compliment please

A backhanded compliment has a derogatory  undercurrent in it. There is a kind of mockery hidden in it.Example is

"You are smarter than you look." Avoid backhanded compliments by all means. It simply shatters the relationships. If you hate the person, not complimenting is the best compliment.

When you feel short of words

It happens. We search for words some times to convey our feelings in the best possible way. Instead of saying something wrong, its better to say in simple words how the other person's achievement made a difference in your life.

Your speech on the subject, "Getting up early in the Mornings" yesterday made me start getting up in the mornings. I found they are really useful. Thank you for the valuable suggestions." This makes really a big difference. This touches the recepient wher it's supposed to touch.

Appreciation before all

When you compliment  before a gathering or in the presence of public, the receiver thinks that your acknowledgement is really sincere and forthright.

Echo complimenting

"The other day Naresh met me and he was all praise for your achievements in the field of Astro Physics. He also said, one of his professors wanted all the details about you and your research work. I think Naresh will soon contact you. By the by, please accept my compliments too on this happy occasion."

 This is called an Echo compliment. It not only carries the sincerity in the compliment, but also makes him elated to know, how his appreciating circles are increasing far and wide.

A delayed compliment is a dead compliment

Its always better to compliment at the earliest than a belated compliment. Don't allow the compliment lose its freshness and greenness.