As human beings, we are all endowed with the same emotions and feelings.  We are  good in some ways --what we call as strengths.   We also have some bad things in us, which sometimes get exhibited and, more often than not, when we are not even conscious of what we are saying or doing. These are our weaknesses.  One of such things is to have a hugely incorrect opinion of ourselves, and start boasting to others that we, as individuals are capable of doing much more than anyone else in a particular group or even a big team, in the office.

If we are in power, this "I" mentality, often assumes a dangerous position.  Our ego simply overtakes us, and our subordinates learn to live with our egos.  

In fact, we discover ways and means of making each subordinate literally obey what we want them to do, irrespective of whether it is right or wrong.  We do not even think how our behavior will hurt others.  A very common manifestation of this giant sized ego is to insist that the subordinates should obtain approval from us, for the most silly or mundane of things.  For example, if a Deputy Manager were to request for a car for official use, to attend a meeting in the Corporate office in the metro city, which is one hundred kilometers away, we insist that the transport in-charge should not only obtain our permission but also obey our decision as to what car should be made available to the official, even when there are clear guidelines made available by the Management for decisions in this regard.

The transport in-charge has only two choices: to obey our decision and fall in line, and become our "yes man" or take a bold decision, merely informing us of his decision.  The latter course of action is often not liked by us.  We do everything possible to make the subordinate follow our "line of thinking" and "our way of doing things'.

Corporate India is replete with such examples of highly egoistic behavior, which gets reflected in very irrational behavior.  More often than not, any official who dares to question our authority becomes our enemy.

Worse, we carry such egos to our homes, and insist that our wives and children also happily follow our decisions, irrespective of whether they were right or wrong in the first place.  

So, the problem is one of our "giant sized ego".  This becomes a real problem at every level.  Many of us who are into this game, loose sight of one very important thing --- building a team is as important as satisfying our own egos.

Many political parties in India are all one man or one woman shows.  The moment the leader is sick or is dead, there is hardly any leader who can step in and fill the void.  This is also true for ordinary mortals like us.  We do not ever think of our own weaknesses and allow our egos to take over, at any point in time. 

There are several reasons why such attitudes of building the "I" is a sure recipe for disaster, whether it is in the office or at home. 

Firstly, it simply puts off all others who are literally forced to simply fall in line, without any choice.  They often nurse hatred towards us, though they may not openly exhibit it, for a simple reason -- we have all the authority.  Sometimes, the pent up anger simply explodes on some day, and the individual may simply resign his or her job.

Secondly, the "I" in us, totally blinds us to better behaviors that can easily win the voluntary co-operation of all others, including peers, subordinates and even superiors.  With a huge amount of research available in advanced Behavioral Sciences, it is extremely possible to change our behavior by seeking feedback from experts well trained in such advanced research and application thereof, in organizational contexts. 

Thirdly, we can also learn from others, if only we can shed our egos. Sane and good advise, more so, by our well wishers will become more available to us.  We can indeed make good use of such advise to really graduate from the "I" to the "We". 

Fourthly, we can see the larger world in a different perspective and learn to appreciate that we need to do much more than what we are doing now.  For instance, a bank official in Chennai, really thought of "We" and did something very unique --- he started a voluntary organization called Exonora in Chennai, which had a clear mandate of doing something to keep public places clean.  Today, this movement has spread to other parts of Tamil Nadu as well. If only each of us take part in such activities by devoting some time every week, the world will be a much better place to live in.

Fifthly, we need to understand that the very purpose of our lives is not to lead selfish lives.  We also need to do something for the society.  This "something" need not take the form of only money.  Some kind words of appreciation for some good work done, some praise for some good recipe done by our wives, some quality time spent with our children, particularly during dinner time, can go a long way in making our lives far better and meaningful.  

None of the aforesaid things can happen if we are to be obsessed with the "I" in us.  Every single behavior, every single word spoken, or any body language at work, is noticed by so many people, even customers and suppliers.  

Unless we change for the better, we can never do what needs to be done, to graduate towards the "We".

Feedback from others can help a great deal.  For instance, the MBAs from the very good B-schools are very talented and are well trained in applied behavioral sciences.  Even if they are younger than us, if we take them into confidence and ask for frank feedback, we can discover our own weaknesses. For, we need to understand that most of our weaknesses get exhibited, more often than not, without our knowledge, in a sort of semi-conscious state.  

It is not impossible to graduate from the "I" to the "We'.  A little bit of effort is needed, but it can be done.  The time to act is now.  For, it is now or never.