pregnant lovers getting ditched:

Moree and more cases are being reported. This has been going on for ages but of late, girls have come forward to complain against their lovers who enjoyed sex with the girls when it lasted and ditched when they found they had enough fun.That the girls are coming forward to complain and fight it out is a good sign.But the nearly 40 increase in teenage pregnancies is a bad sign.Why do girls consent for sex before marriage?No, i am not raising this question from the angle of purity. It is not that important. I am raising this question from the after effects of such pre-marital sex relationships.Boys come with various pretects to enjoy sex. Sex is one of the glorious aspects of marital life. Sex before marriage takes away the real thrill of this relationship. Secondly, sex in early ages makes one bored with it by the time they reach thirties when, their sexual desire is likely to peak. So, multiple partner sex or unorthodox varieties will be sought after. Sexually transmitted diseases can affect the girls ( and boys ). Frequent abortions would seriously damage the health of the girls. The morning after pills are also likely to affect the health of the girls.So, when boys insist on sex before marriage, why the girls do not understand real intentions of the boys and ditch them?, Any sex on the promise of marriage but reneged later amounts to rape. This is the legal position.

There are numerous situations where a woman is misled, misguided, traumatized, tortured and/or blackmailed to do things unwillingly.And then there are women who are bold and do things differently. They approach the society differently.  When a girl is born in the house, parents must keep in mind that there are predators out there. She has to be taught how to be on guard at all times. Even when she is at the wrong place at the wrong time, she has to know how to get out of that situation with a smile on her face. As far as I know, most parents don't even know how to handle situations like those. Times have changed and what a woman faces today is completely different from what a woman has faced 10 years ago. And it will continue to change for predators are smartly ill minded.I don't know How a woman can be taught that she is vulnerable to unexpected situations, but she HAS to be taught. Knowledge is the only answer.

Traditional and respectful to women?

I have seen that most part of people who respect women are those who have a kind of "modern view" while people who call themselves more "traditional" or even religious are those who use the so called indian traditions to exploit women.  People with modern outlook treat women with equality and respect. But people who are more into culture & traditions, often treat women as inferior beings.But I don't think that these people know much about our old culture, or have any interest in it. I could be wrong, but I believe that culture has come a long way from the olden times when women were treated with respect. Over the centuries, somehow we became a male dominated society. In the Ramayana, Lord Rama treats all women with utmost respect.Many people decipher this to mean that women deserve beating, according to Tulsi. Even in those days, women had the right to choose their own husbandsr. The very fact that men had to prove their valour and bravery in a contest for the swyamvar proves that women were considered precious, and men had to struggle to get one. Earth is considered as Mother.A man is considered ineligible to donate unless there is a woman by his side.A daughter is considered Lakshmi - wealth.All according to Hindu philosophy. A woman was always respected. Only after the invasion of the foreigners, treatment of woman changed in India. Of course, there are a few instances of mis behaving with women in our mythological stories and epics too. But the incidence is rare. In general, a woman was held in esteem.We hear or read one single thing, and we use it to bash our own roots. Speaking against religion, God, culture etc is so fashionable today.

working women versus non working women:

Is only working woman can be a good mate? In todays fasting world any boy who is suitable for marriage always demand for a working girl as a partner. What about her mental structure, her ideas, her thinking. Is it only a working woman wud be a good wife or rather house wife.The feminists glorify the financially independent woman who works professionaly while they see a housewife as vermin, literally. they see housework and motherhood and babies as inhibition etc. they have changed these attitudes of men & women in the west that women should pursue their interests in the professional life etc. the result is that the housewife in todays world is looked down upon. life has been made more difficult for her.Today our television is presenting a new image of women, a woman who is not working out yet truly aware of the world outside, she just sticks to traditional values yet open to the modern changes too. Whenever there is problem in the house come, she tries to solve it thru her wit and determination. She is a domestic woman but she is not in any ways behind those who work outside. So I don think these type of woman are only at the television screens they exist in our society too. So only working out cant make women superior.

Do cnsider the following situations.

1. A 15 year old girl in Bangalore, in collaboration with her "lover", smothered the mother who opposed their marriage, just 6 days ago.

2. A hindu brahmin girl who married a Christian was forced to become a Christian first.

3. A muslim nearly uneducated garage mechanic and his family threatened a Hindu brahmin girl to convert into islam and marry him. She was studying Enginering and came in contact with this boy who was an auto driver, wanted to change him from his wayward habits. She could not get out of that because he had coaxed her into physical relationship When she had to chose between her parents and this lover boy who did "not change from his wayward boy", she was threatned with dire consequences. The girl approached me for help. I told her she should think what is good for her life, her future. I received threatening phone calls asking me to advise her to MARRY HIM. i took it up with Bangalore police. then, threatening clls and e mails stopped.

When our youngsters can understand the differrence between infatuation and love, when they have the capacity to judge the implications of their love affair, when they have belief in each other, love marriages are suitable.But the so called love affairs that are taking place are on hollow ground. I keep coming across several such cases. I ask one question to the girl, IF YOUR PARENTS OPPOSE ARE YOU PREPARED TO RUN AWAY? This is an area where many a girl faces a dilemma. And in several cases, a couple of months after marriage, the relationship is completely broken.Until our girls KNOW HOW TO CHOSE THE RIGHT BOY, they have problem of security and safety. In this connection, family background becomes important.Gandhiji says, for any marriage to have sanctity, LOVE, MUTUAL TRUST AND SELF RESTRAINT are the three characterestics required. If these are the basis on which relationship of love is developed, then, Love Marriages are right.I believe in love marriages only. But, i dont oppose the arranged marriages! Marrying is a great risk, one has to take. how it turns out, we cant easily predict.

Values are important. Parents should first be prepared to accept LOVE MARRIAGE IS NO SHAME. Girls have to be educated on how to select the right boy. And boys have to be taught how to trust girls and how not to treat them as their private property. And both boys and girls have to be taught how to resolve their differrences. This is the actual need of our desi girls and boys.women are more emotional. at the same time, men dont like to show that they are emotionally weak but want to establish that they are strong. Women dont mind showing their emotional weakness!Have you observed one curious phenomenon putta? When the wife dies, the husband does not take much time to marry again. But when the husband dies, the wife gives up everything, builds up life of her children and establishes them on her own.some say, man wants sex, that is why he does it. i disagree. i have seen men past beyond that age too marrying. Men are not that strong to manage their own life and are substantially dependent on women for that.

"society looks down on women who remarry and applauds men who do remarry."

Very true my child. But then, the society will always comment on anything we do. Though we are part of it, we need not be dictated by it. If the society upholds the rich and mighty no matter what they do, then, the society loses its value. Like it has. Now. Look at the kind of murders committed for flimsy reasons even by students in primary school. The number of inebriated young running over people, firmly assured that their parents would protect them. Only two examples.But the HARSH REALITY is the Society is dominated the world over by MEN. People in power never digest loss of power. It is only by STANDING UP, women have reached the stage where they are now.
Not that all men are bad and all women are good. Upbringing, genetic factor also plays an important role. BUT THE BIGGEST ISSUE FOR WOMEN. especialy in the Indian context is TO BE EDUCATED , ECONOMICALLY INDEPENDENT AND CULTURED.By CULTURED, i mean a woman with certain value systems, certain principles and certain life styles.

cheerleaders:

Cheerleaders are new phenomena in India so people are excited to see them. Let it be there for some time and dust will settle down. Basic purpose of cheerleaders are to cheer up players and entertain people. . Of course its wrong to shoot from certain angles but as we know our cameraman also coming frame same hypocrite society who love to see women body but also like to show that they are against such bold cloths because of our so called culture.Same politician never hesitate to sexually abuse woman whenever they get chance and over here to show the love for women kind they keep saying its an insult of our culture.i think it is ridiculous. I think cricket matches are supposed to be something that u can watch with your family, etc. As a mother of a baby boy, I don't think I would like my child to watch cricket when he is a kid, for ex. And as a wife I don't feel comfortable at all that my husband is watching the match and also seen under girl's skirts. The way that India is taking now is exatly the same way that all the western countries took before. In western also women used in general used to be very chaste and cover all their bodies. Now we see how things are. People in India think they'll be able to keep their "culture" because India is different of all the other countries, specially western countries. But a brief look at history will show that things are not like that. I think Indian movies in general became much more indecent then western ones, in most part of the times. They can't show a kiss but there's also an excuse to put girl dancing in an indecent way with very few clothes. Now we can't even watch a match without this same kind of thing.

punishment for crimes like rape:

not all rape is violent and there are several forms of rape. you cannot compare a rape which involved kidnapping, beating and brutality to the victim to lets say date rape which invloves subtle coercion of the female (but is nevertheles rape technically). the former may deserve a more severe punishment but the latters punishment should be different. also punishment should be based upon effect on the victim. but even in severe cases 'castrtion' is actually wrong. there are people who oppose death penalty for murders and then those who want to cut off the dicks of rapists why isnt that inhuman? give them punishment according to the existing laws like life imprisonmnt or death penalty (in severe cases).

women's freedom:

Originally it was expressed that women should not imitate men because in imitating men doesn't lie their own freedom. Rather, independence should mean the freedom to do whatever you wish to - of course, within the boundaries of law drawn up by a civilized society to maintain order.Freedom is not the end and you will be wrong if you consider it to be so. It is only a means to address effectively the various issues that trouble womenkind. Fight for your freedom so that you can do what you wish to and not what others tell you. At the same time, if women have never liked to be told what to do and what not, how to behave and whom to meet etc.then, some women in this modern world should not tell other members of their sex what constitutes freedom and what does not, right?. women were never made like men. Nature created men & women wd seperate vision. So women's freedom, for me, is celebrating this diffrnce. why can't a woman live her own life in the way she wants to. At the end of the day it's her choice to fag, party, be a house wife or work outside, marry or live-in wd a man. till the time she's not harming anyone, she can do whtever is legal. This is not called imitating, does it? As far as who's the best is concerned, I guess both men & women can never be compared. They both have diferentr qual & differences competitive advantages! they both are the best species on this earth.