Funny Jokes ha ha ha.

Santa Shouting 2 His GF
" U Said V Will Do Register
Marriage And Cheated Me,
I Was Waiting 4 U
Yesterday Whole Day
In The Post Office...." :laugh: :laugh:

How do frogs take notes, the teacher asked.
The student said, 'On lily Pads."

How do you know the computer is old?

It says loss of memory

What happens to an illegally parked frog ? Asked the new recruit in the police
The Officer said that the Frog will be Toad away.

Computer joke

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What is the longest word in the English language?
SMILES: there is a mile between the first and last letters!" :laugh:

Na mera bap, Na mera taya
Ro Ro k mene Pakistan banya
In pyar karne walo ne zra b reham na khaya
Kambkhto ne mere mazar ko DATE POINT bnaya.

In n exam, a gal sitting on desk next to santa asked, "Mujhe is answer ki starting batado baki main likh lungi"
Santa said, "The answer of this question is, baki tum likhlo"

Teacher: Maria please point to America on the map.
Maria: This is it.
Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America?
Class: Maria did.

Police caught 3 thieves. Then he started interrogating them.
What's your name?
Bannerjee.
Yours ?
Chatterjjee.
Yours ?
Mukherjee.

My goodness. All of you are thieves and you have the audacity of adding "JI" to your names?

Teacher : Showing the legs of the bird and asking tell me the name of the bird
Student : I don't know
Teacher: You are failed. Tell me your name
Student: See my legs and tell my name
Teacher : What?
Student: You are failed. -*- +

A: Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?
B: Yes I am, I married the wrong woman.... :lol: :lol:

Manager : What do you want?

Sardar : Can your bank give me first loan after that leave me alone.

Manager : First loan given by us and next alone will be in jail.

Doob Jati Hen Kashtiyan Jab Atey Hen Tufan,
.
Yadein Reh Jati Hen Bichar Jate Hen Insan,
.
Yaad Rakho To Bohat Qarib Paoge,
.
Bhool Jaoge To thappar khao gai

Sita asked Rita,
I heard your Mother in Law was bitten by a dog. How is she now?
Rita replied, "She is alright . But the poor dog died."

1st year MBBS students were attending their 1st anatomy class.

They all gathered around the table with real dead body.
The professor started the class by telling them two important qualities as a doctor.

The 1st is that never be disgusted about anything regarding the body e.g. he inserted his finger in the body’s nose & on drawing back, put the finger in his own mouth & tasted it.

Then he told the students to do the same.

The students hesitated for several minutes, but eventually everyone inserted their fingers in the body’s nose & tasted it.

When everyone finished the professor looked at them & said :The most important 2nd quality is Observation.

I inserted my middle finger but tasted the index finger. Now learn to pay attention!

All students : shitttt !! :lol: :laugh: :laugh:

When I returned from my office, I was happy to see my wife's beaming face. I asked, "What's the matter darling, you look happy?

My wife replied, Your mother has gone."

A good medical QUOTE:-
Obesity is not because it runs in the family!!!!!
It is because, no one runs in the family!!!!!

A guy says to his friend, "Guess how many coins I have in my pocket."
The friends says, "If I guess right, will you give me one of them?"
The first guys says, "If you guess right, I'll give you both of them!" ... :huh:

Santa & his wife went for Divorce at court.

Judge : You have 3 kids .. How will you divide them?

Santa had long discussion with Banto & said
“ok, sirji We will come next year with 1 more”

9 months later

.

.

.

They got twins.