Is Marriage absolutely Essential ?

Marriage is a social necessity. This us basis of basic social unit- family- and is necessary for orderly functioning of society. There is no doubt that marriage is absolutely necessary from social angle.

But macro and micro levels differ. Marriage is necessary from viewpoint of society. But this is not essential for an individual. An individual too busy with social, educational, political, religious or other pursuits may find marriage as an obstacle and decide not to marry. There is no harm if small minority remain unmarried. But this should not be general trend. If a large number say about 40% choose to live unmarried, there will be social anarchy.

I agree with your views ! I too am of the same opinion that it is an essential institution from the sociological point of view .However, there is a tendency these days not to marry .Many youngsters feel that the chances of marriages failing are much more now because of the changed life style, so they are wary of getting married..

This changed lifestyle has been given by whom, the parents of this very generation who has opted to choose the lifestyle they like, every kind of freedom has been given to them and so we cannot fully blame them for not wanting to be caught in a marriage!

Yes that's true Kalyani, also the western influence which we cannot overlook!I don't blame it , but what is ok there sometimes doesnt work here as well, simply because there are so many other differences in our whole cultural background !
I came across a very interesting statistics about divorce rates across the world - 1, Athiests have the lowest average divorce rates
2, Russia has the highest divorce rate in the world..

Marriage is a social necessity. This us basis of basic social unit- family- and is necessary for orderly functioning of society. There is no doubt that marriage is absolutely necessary from social angle.

But macro and micro levels differ. Marriage is necessary from viewpoint of society. But this is not essential for an individual. An individual too busy with social, educational, political, religious or other pursuits may find marriage as an obstacle and decide not to marry. There is no harm if small minority remain unmarried. But this should not be general trend. If a large number say about 40% choose to live unmarried, there will be social anarchy.

I agree with your views ! I too am of the same opinion that it is an essential institution from the sociological point of view .However, there is a tendency these days not to marry .Many youngsters feel that the chances of marriages failing are much more now because of the changed life style, so they are wary of getting married..

This changed lifestyle has been given by whom, the parents of this very generation who has opted to choose the lifestyle they like, every kind of freedom has been given to them and so we cannot fully blame them for not wanting to be caught in a marriage!

Yes that's true Kalyani, also the western influence which we cannot overlook!I don't blame it , but what is ok there sometimes doesnt work here as well, simply because there are so many other differences in our whole cultural background !
I came across a very interesting statistics about divorce rates across the world - 1, Athiests have the lowest average divorce rates
2, Russia has the highest divorce rate in the world..

So, apparently, atheists are more socially responsible citizens. Their ethical standard does not depend on religion but on true appreciation of role as member of society.

My simple take on this issue is that marriage as an institution has survived so many thousand years and the search for its alternative has met with failures with all good reasons. The kind of needs that marriage fulfill has been tried in some other form which created more problems of disastrous nature for society!

Thats true, marriage has fulfilled many functions and needs of an individual, but , change is an integral part of life and the institution of marriage too would see some changes depending on the changed life style !

My simple take on this issue is that marriage as an institution has survived so many thousand years and the search for its alternative has met with failures with all good reasons. The kind of needs that marriage fulfill has been tried in some other form which created more problems of disastrous nature for society!

Thats true, marriage has fulfilled many functions and needs of an individual, but , change is an integral part of life and the institution of marriage too would see some changes depending on the changed life style !

Of course, changes are already visible. There may be more changes in future. Now spouses are more like equals than traditional male dominated households. Now we have many working wives and thus the concept of man as bread winner and woman as simply house keeper is changing.

Despite these changes, marriage as an institution survives. If live in relation is sincere, this is also as good as marriage. Wedding is just one moment whereas married life is a matter of decades.

Marriage as an institution too has evolved over the decades with the societal progress. Interestingly with all its defects,it is never threatened with abolition or extinction mainly because its core values have stood the test time. Marriage is just not between two bodies but two souls too. It encompasses a gamut of very intricate issues. What attracts in the first place is purely carnal,then giving way to a more mature,responsible and subtle relationship.

It's true.....either man or woman can't live alone in this world. Even if, they may be financially stable, they need some mental support also. It's possible with 100% effect only through marriages. By marrying a person, we are taking more responsibilities and getting many things in return also, which is not at all possible in a live-together relationship. I am 100% sure, society will never give respect to non-marriage relations even if it's bond is 1000 times stronger than a daily quarrelling couple. Isn't it? That's the importance of marriages.
Also, marriage is a promise or assurance or guarantee that the relationship will stay long and those people who can't keep that promise will stay away from marriage thoughts even if the other person is dearest to him/her

Marriage is not all necessary in my opinion but our society is such that one has to marry even if not willing to do so. :evil: I remember i got married at the age of 29 years i never wanted to marry as i always fear of taking responsibilities and finally i succumb to the pressure of my parents and got married. :evil: But now when i got married i took responsibilities of a family and taking up these nicely. :) I think most of the people do fear like me but that's life we can't run away from these and can't give this as the only excuse not to get married. :woohoo: :laugh:

My simple take on this issue is that marriage as an institution has survived so many thousand years and the search for its alternative has met with failures with all good reasons. The kind of needs that marriage fulfill has been tried in some other form which created more problems of disastrous nature for society!

I agree but my point is, why force it on those who do not want it. Let them choose for themselves and find out what works best!!

I would go with that.Last year we had rented out a part of our house for a short period of time since we were going to be away. A couple wanted to stay there, both working for Infosys tech and I spoke to them for a short time and liked them and on the spot we decided on the rent and other details...They moved in the very next day.After a while I got a call from my neighbor saying that I had made a wrong choice, now the entire neighborhood is very disturbed by the couples behavior..I decided to check it out and came to Mangalore on a Friday and found nothing wrong.They were busy with their work.In the evening they had a few friends over for drinks and dinner..The whole issue was that they were not married and anything they did was wrong as far as my neighbors were concerned.I had a talk with my neighbors and finally things did calm down and the couple stayed on...
Our society is now at cross roads and one can understand that it is not easy to change ..

My simple take on this issue is that marriage as an institution has survived so many thousand years and the search for its alternative has met with failures with all good reasons. The kind of needs that marriage fulfill has been tried in some other form which created more problems of disastrous nature for society!

I agree but my point is, why force it on those who do not want it. Let them choose for themselves and find out what works best!!

I would go with that.Last year we had rented out a part of our house for a short period of time since we were going to be away. A couple wanted to stay there, both working for Infosys tech and I spoke to them for a short time and liked them and on the spot we decided on the rent and other details...They moved in the very next day.After a while I got a call from my neighbor saying that I had made a wrong choice, now the entire neighborhood is very disturbed by the couples behavior..I decided to check it out and came to Mangalore on a Friday and found nothing wrong.They were busy with their work.In the evening they had a few friends over for drinks and dinner..The whole issue was that they were not married and anything they did was wrong as far as my neighbors were concerned.I had a talk with my neighbors and finally things did calm down and the couple stayed on...
Our society is now at cross roads and one can understand that it is not easy to change ..

its not your neighbor's fault was we don't accept live in relationships in India socially. :blink:

My simple take on this issue is that marriage as an institution has survived so many thousand years and the search for its alternative has met with failures with all good reasons. The kind of needs that marriage fulfill has been tried in some other form which created more problems of disastrous nature for society!

I agree but my point is, why force it on those who do not want it. Let them choose for themselves and find out what works best!!

I would go with that.Last year we had rented out a part of our house for a short period of time since we were going to be away. A couple wanted to stay there, both working for Infosys tech and I spoke to them for a short time and liked them and on the spot we decided on the rent and other details...They moved in the very next day.After a while I got a call from my neighbor saying that I had made a wrong choice, now the entire neighborhood is very disturbed by the couples behavior..I decided to check it out and came to Mangalore on a Friday and found nothing wrong.They were busy with their work.In the evening they had a few friends over for drinks and dinner..The whole issue was that they were not married and anything they did was wrong as far as my neighbors were concerned.I had a talk with my neighbors and finally things did calm down and the couple stayed on...
Our society is now at cross roads and one can understand that it is not easy to change ..

its not your neighbor's fault was we don't accept live in relationships in India socially. :blink:

Are you serious Sanjeev ? There are many such relationships that existed during good old times ? Men have always had more than one wife and that was accepted by all during those times . How many men in villages and smaller towns have mistresses ?- The problem with Indian society is its double standard.

My simple take on this issue is that marriage as an institution has survived so many thousand years and the search for its alternative has met with failures with all good reasons. The kind of needs that marriage fulfill has been tried in some other form which created more problems of disastrous nature for society!

I agree but my point is, why force it on those who do not want it. Let them choose for themselves and find out what works best!!

I would go with that.Last year we had rented out a part of our house for a short period of time since we were going to be away. A couple wanted to stay there, both working for Infosys tech and I spoke to them for a short time and liked them and on the spot we decided on the rent and other details...They moved in the very next day.After a while I got a call from my neighbor saying that I had made a wrong choice, now the entire neighborhood is very disturbed by the couples behavior..I decided to check it out and came to Mangalore on a Friday and found nothing wrong.They were busy with their work.In the evening they had a few friends over for drinks and dinner..The whole issue was that they were not married and anything they did was wrong as far as my neighbors were concerned.I had a talk with my neighbors and finally things did calm down and the couple stayed on...
Our society is now at cross roads and one can understand that it is not easy to change ..

its not your neighbor's fault was we don't accept live in relationships in India socially. :blink:

If some one is in live in relation, this only means that formal wedding ceremony was not held. I wonder if anyone verifies wedding ceremony of a couple before renting accommodation. I have given a portion of my house on rent to many couples in last decade. As they appeared as husband and wife, i take them as married. I never checked their marriage certificate or saw their wedding photos. In fact, nobody does so.

hence, it is fault of the couple to announce openly that they are in live in relation. If they just are a little discreet, nobody is bothered about their relation and all will consider them as married only.

My simple take on this issue is that marriage as an institution has survived so many thousand years and the search for its alternative has met with failures with all good reasons. The kind of needs that marriage fulfill has been tried in some other form which created more problems of disastrous nature for society!

I agree but my point is, why force it on those who do not want it. Let them choose for themselves and find out what works best!!

I would go with that.Last year we had rented out a part of our house for a short period of time since we were going to be away. A couple wanted to stay there, both working for Infosys tech and I spoke to them for a short time and liked them and on the spot we decided on the rent and other details...They moved in the very next day.After a while I got a call from my neighbor saying that I had made a wrong choice, now the entire neighborhood is very disturbed by the couples behavior..I decided to check it out and came to Mangalore on a Friday and found nothing wrong.They were busy with their work.In the evening they had a few friends over for drinks and dinner..The whole issue was that they were not married and anything they did was wrong as far as my neighbors were concerned.I had a talk with my neighbors and finally things did calm down and the couple stayed on...
Our society is now at cross roads and one can understand that it is not easy to change ..

its not your neighbor's fault was we don't accept live in relationships in India socially. :blink:

If some one is in live in relation, this only means that formal wedding ceremony was not held. I wonder if anyone verifies wedding ceremony of a couple before renting accommodation. I have given a portion of my house on rent to many couples in last decade. As they appeared as husband and wife, i take them as married. I never checked their marriage certificate or saw their wedding photos. In fact, nobody does so.

hence, it is fault of the couple to announce openly that they are in live in relation. If they just are a little discreet, nobody is bothered about their relation and all will consider them as married only.

The problem with small cities is that people are far too curious about others and thats what happened with this couple too.They never told me anything and since they were very busy they hardly had any interaction with the neighbors.But there is always a cousin,uncle, brother or someone working in Infosys , where they are both well known and thats how the news became public - not from them but from other sources :cheer:

Yes it is very very essential. Without the loving and caring of anybody we cannot travel our whole life. so it is essential

Yes it is very very essential. Without the loving and caring of anybody we cannot travel our whole life. so it is essential

Yes I agree with that,it gives us security besides other things.Having your own family gives you an identity of your own ..

We need a life partner to live our life. That is why, Marriage is essential.

Ask any married they will say unmarried is ok.
Ask any unmarried they will say marriage life is ok.
I can say Delhi ka ladoo, jo khaya o pastya, jo nehi khaya o bhi postya.

The bachelors have many problems on social occasions. There are many ceremonies that need spouse. In the army, there are many activities that favor a married person. A single feels isolated at functions where couples are invited. There are functions like 'husband nights' in army, which are for the married.

Except for certain handicaps like these, there is nothing wrong in leading an unmarried life. But this should be exception. marriage is a social necessity.

yes marriage is essential because after marriage you get a partner who is every time with us in pain and pleasure.

yes marriage is essential because after marriage you get a partner who is every time with us in pain and pleasure.

Our life changes. We can share everything with our life partner.

Ask any married they will say unmarried is ok.
Ask any unmarried they will say marriage life is ok.
I can say Delhi ka ladoo, jo khaya o pastya, jo nehi khaya o bhi postya.

Thats very true ! The Far Away Pastures Always Look Greener , so also in life and marriage !