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Kalyani Nandurkar said thank you to usha manohar for his/her reply to the topic Are we leading to Empty Nester Syndrome?.
Kalyani Nandurkar wrote:
chinmoymukherjee wrote:
What appeared to be exceptional cases decades back is now endemic and this problem is spreading its tentacles in Indian society. With single child norm being practised on a massiv scale in urban India and parental obsession has acquired a pathological dimensions.I have two shatteringly tragic cases in which both the middle-aged couples
took their lives following the accidental deaths of their only son.The parents have to develop the right kind of detachment and de-obsess,if I am permitted to use right term, from the affairs of their wards which take off to a different trajectory once they grow mature.They have to discover a world beyond their obsessions by engaging more with the bigger world.
So true Chinmoy, it has become very essential for almost all parents to develop this kind of mindset where a single child has become a norm. My own example is no different, my son is just about to turn 8 and I already suffer from separation anxiety, I become too restless when he is out of my sight for more than an hour, with exception of when he is in school. My husband keeps advising me the same thing that you just said, try and start developing certain level of detachment from him, for in just a few years he will grow and leave home for his education, career, then what would I do?
However, it is a different story for parents who lose their only child at a young age, a child leaving home and another leaving this world are quite different things. But it depends on parents how they deal with such crisis. There are some who choose to quit and give up their lives and there are some who channelise their grief into something concrete and worthwhile and extend their love to other children. A couple in Pune similarly lost their young son tragically, Mr. Vijay Phalnikar and Mrs. Sadhana Phalnikar gave vent to their grief of losing their only son by starting an ambulance service for poor children who could not afford treatment. Slowly and steadily, they have grown to such a scale where they house orphans and abandoned old people with love and care, a hospital, vocational training centre etc.
See the link to understand the scale of their work: www.apalaghar.com
Kalyani, having children away from home is something else but to lose a child in your life time is the greatest tragedy there ever is...I can actually feel the pain those parents suffer and go through all their life .I wonder whether I would ever be able to cope with such a loss ! However, I salute people like Mr Vijay Phalnikar and Sadhana for doing what they are , truly remarkable !
10 years ago
Kalyani Nandurkar said thank you to rambabu for his/her reply to the topic Are we leading to Empty Nester Syndrome?.
Vijay Phalnikar and his better half set an example in showing how the past can be buried and start living in the present. There is no use of crying over the split milk.
10 years ago
usha manohar replied to the topic Are we leading to Empty Nester Syndrome?.
Kalyani Nandurkar wrote:
chinmoymukherjee wrote:
What appeared to be exceptional cases decades back is now endemic and this problem is spreading its tentacles in Indian society. With single child norm being practised on a massiv scale in urban India and parental obsession has acquired a pathological dimensions.I have two shatteringly tragic cases in which both the middle-aged couples
took their lives following the accidental deaths of their only son.The parents have to develop the right kind of detachment and de-obsess,if I am permitted to use right term, from the affairs of their wards which take off to a different trajectory once they grow mature.They have to discover a world beyond their obsessions by engaging more with the bigger world.
So true Chinmoy, it has become very essential for almost all parents to develop this kind of mindset where a single child has become a norm. My own example is no different, my son is just about to turn 8 and I already suffer from separation anxiety, I become too restless when he is out of my sight for more than an hour, with exception of when he is in school. My husband keeps advising me the same thing that you just said, try and start developing certain level of detachment from him, for in just a few years he will grow and leave home for his education, career, then what would I do?
However, it is a different story for parents who lose their only child at a young age, a child leaving home and another leaving this world are quite different things. But it depends on parents how they deal with such crisis. There are some who choose to quit and give up their lives and there are some who channelise their grief into something concrete and worthwhile and extend their love to other children. A couple in Pune similarly lost their young son tragically, Mr. Vijay Phalnikar and Mrs. Sadhana Phalnikar gave vent to their grief of losing their only son by starting an ambulance service for poor children who could not afford treatment. Slowly and steadily, they have grown to such a scale where they house orphans and abandoned old people with love and care, a hospital, vocational training centre etc.
See the link to understand the scale of their work: www.apalaghar.com
Kalyani, having children away from home is something else but to lose a child in your life time is the greatest tragedy there ever is...I can actually feel the pain those parents suffer and go through all their life .I wonder whether I would ever be able to cope with such a loss ! However, I salute people like Mr Vijay Phalnikar and Sadhana for doing what they are , truly remarkable !
10 years ago
Kalyani Nandurkar replied to the topic Marathi film 'Court' is India's entry for Oscars.
rambabu wrote:
True. Regional movies are well made in all respects. Realism takes the pride of place. I still remember "Shantata Court Chalu Aahe "
That was one iconic movie which is liked and applauded by film lovers even today. There were other really good films too made recently such as Shwaas, Sukhant etc. but did not do much on the box office.
10 years ago
usha manohar liked a reply to the topic A well read individual is Intelligent or Is an Intelligent person well read !.
10 years ago
chinmoymukherjee said thank you to Lopamudra for his/her reply to the topic A well read individual is Intelligent or Is an Intelligent person well read !.
chinmoymukherjee wrote:@Usha I regard the biological source as the primary one and environment to be the facilitating source of intelligence which,to my mind,could be the only rational explanation for varying degrees of intelligence and stupidity both.Otherwise we would be having thousands of Vivekanandas nd Tagores in our midst!!
True and this is what Behavioral genetics is all about. Firstly, not all traits are inherited equally otherwise there would not be any variation .Secondly, environment affects the genes to bring about further differences. Differences therefore are seen among individuals in terms of intelligence, behavior, looks and various abilities such as art , craft, music etc.
10 years ago
chinmoymukherjee liked a reply to the topic A well read individual is Intelligent or Is an Intelligent person well read !.
10 years ago
rambabu replied to the topic Are we leading to Empty Nester Syndrome?.
Separations, unions and sorrow and happiness are the reality of life. They should be accepted as they come. "Be happy thing happened. Don't lament when the happy moments are over."
After all all good things have an end, sooner or later.
10 years ago
rambabu replied to the topic Marathi film 'Court' is India's entry for Oscars.
True. Regional movies are well made in all respects. Realism takes the pride of place. I still remember "Shantata Court Chalu Aahe "
10 years ago
Lopamudra replied to the topic Are we leading to Empty Nester Syndrome?.
For every parent , separation from their children is painful which I think has always been the case but now parents too attached and make themselves too emotionally involved in every aspect of their children's lives as a result the moment they leave nest, the emptiness sinks in. However, most people adjust to the situation since everyone would like to see their children prosper in terms of job /education and be settled and happy in their own lives. It gives more pleasure to know that your kids are away but doing well than sitting at home with you and not doing much!!
10 years ago
rambabu replied to the topic Are we leading to Empty Nester Syndrome?.
Vijay Phalnikar and his better half set an example in showing how the past can be buried and start living in the present. There is no use of crying over the split milk.
10 years ago
Kalyani Nandurkar replied to the topic Marathi film 'Court' is India's entry for Oscars.
It has been proved once again that regional movies with good content and ground reality are better films, even though they may not entertain as much as the Bollywood movies do.
10 years ago
rambabu replied to the topic A well read individual is Intelligent or Is an Intelligent person well read !.
There is saying in Sanskrit. Pandita Putra Sunthaha. Means a sholar's son need not be a scholar always. All traits of a parent generally need not be inherited by the children. In this respect, environment in and around the house and changing times play a key role in shaping a person.
10 years ago
Kalyani Nandurkar replied to the topic Are we leading to Empty Nester Syndrome?.
chinmoymukherjee wrote:
What appeared to be exceptional cases decades back is now endemic and this problem is spreading its tentacles in Indian society. With single child norm being practised on a massiv scale in urban India and parental obsession has acquired a pathological dimensions.I have two shatteringly tragic cases in which both the middle-aged couples
took their lives following the accidental deaths of their only son.The parents have to develop the right kind of detachment and de-obsess,if I am permitted to use right term, from the affairs of their wards which take off to a different trajectory once they grow mature.They have to discover a world beyond their obsessions by engaging more with the bigger world.
So true Chinmoy, it has become very essential for almost all parents to develop this kind of mindset where a single child has become a norm. My own example is no different, my son is just about to turn 8 and I already suffer from separation anxiety, I become too restless when he is out of my sight for more than an hour, with exception of when he is in school. My husband keeps advising me the same thing that you just said, try and start developing certain level of detachment from him, for in just a few years he will grow and leave home for his education, career, then what would I do?
However, it is a different story for parents who lose their only child at a young age, a child leaving home and another leaving this world are quite different things. But it depends on parents how they deal with such crisis. There are some who choose to quit and give up their lives and there are some who channelise their grief into something concrete and worthwhile and extend their love to other children. A couple in Pune similarly lost their young son tragically, Mr. Vijay Phalnikar and Mrs. Sadhana Phalnikar gave vent to their grief of losing their only son by starting an ambulance service for poor children who could not afford treatment. Slowly and steadily, they have grown to such a scale where they house orphans and abandoned old people with love and care, a hospital, vocational training centre etc.
See the link to understand the scale of their work: www.apalaghar.com
10 years ago
Lopamudra replied to the topic Marathi film 'Court' is India's entry for Oscars.
Best wishes to the team...Would love to see the film .
10 years ago
rambabu replied to the topic Marathi film 'Court' is India's entry for Oscars.
I hope, at least this time the Movie Court wins the coveted Oscar, which has been evading India.
I wish Chaitanya Tamhane and India good luck.
10 years ago
Kalyani Nandurkar said thank you to usha manohar for his/her reply to the topic Are we leading to Empty Nester Syndrome?.
Kalyani Nandurkar wrote:
chinmoymukherjee wrote:
What appeared to be exceptional cases decades back is now endemic and this problem is spreading its tentacles in Indian society. With single child norm being practised on a massiv scale in urban India and parental obsession has acquired a pathological dimensions.I have two shatteringly tragic cases in which both the middle-aged couples
took their lives following the accidental deaths of their only son.The parents have to develop the right kind of detachment and de-obsess,if I am permitted to use right term, from the affairs of their wards which take off to a different trajectory once they grow mature.They have to discover a world beyond their obsessions by engaging more with the bigger world.
So true Chinmoy, it has become very essential for almost all parents to develop this kind of mindset where a single child has become a norm. My own example is no different, my son is just about to turn 8 and I already suffer from separation anxiety, I become too restless when he is out of my sight for more than an hour, with exception of when he is in school. My husband keeps advising me the same thing that you just said, try and start developing certain level of detachment from him, for in just a few years he will grow and leave home for his education, career, then what would I do?
However, it is a different story for parents who lose their only child at a young age, a child leaving home and another leaving this world are quite different things. But it depends on parents how they deal with such crisis. There are some who choose to quit and give up their lives and there are some who channelise their grief into something concrete and worthwhile and extend their love to other children. A couple in Pune similarly lost their young son tragically, Mr. Vijay Phalnikar and Mrs. Sadhana Phalnikar gave vent to their grief of losing their only son by starting an ambulance service for poor children who could not afford treatment. Slowly and steadily, they have grown to such a scale where they house orphans and abandoned old people with love and care, a hospital, vocational training centre etc.
See the link to understand the scale of their work: www.apalaghar.com
Kalyani, having children away from home is something else but to lose a child in your life time is the greatest tragedy there ever is...I can actually feel the pain those parents suffer and go through all their life .I wonder whether I would ever be able to cope with such a loss ! However, I salute people like Mr Vijay Phalnikar and Sadhana for doing what they are , truly remarkable !
10 years ago
Kalyani Nandurkar said thank you to rambabu for his/her reply to the topic Are we leading to Empty Nester Syndrome?.
Vijay Phalnikar and his better half set an example in showing how the past can be buried and start living in the present. There is no use of crying over the split milk.
10 years ago
usha manohar replied to the topic Are we leading to Empty Nester Syndrome?.
Kalyani Nandurkar wrote:
chinmoymukherjee wrote:
What appeared to be exceptional cases decades back is now endemic and this problem is spreading its tentacles in Indian society. With single child norm being practised on a massiv scale in urban India and parental obsession has acquired a pathological dimensions.I have two shatteringly tragic cases in which both the middle-aged couples
took their lives following the accidental deaths of their only son.The parents have to develop the right kind of detachment and de-obsess,if I am permitted to use right term, from the affairs of their wards which take off to a different trajectory once they grow mature.They have to discover a world beyond their obsessions by engaging more with the bigger world.
So true Chinmoy, it has become very essential for almost all parents to develop this kind of mindset where a single child has become a norm. My own example is no different, my son is just about to turn 8 and I already suffer from separation anxiety, I become too restless when he is out of my sight for more than an hour, with exception of when he is in school. My husband keeps advising me the same thing that you just said, try and start developing certain level of detachment from him, for in just a few years he will grow and leave home for his education, career, then what would I do?
However, it is a different story for parents who lose their only child at a young age, a child leaving home and another leaving this world are quite different things. But it depends on parents how they deal with such crisis. There are some who choose to quit and give up their lives and there are some who channelise their grief into something concrete and worthwhile and extend their love to other children. A couple in Pune similarly lost their young son tragically, Mr. Vijay Phalnikar and Mrs. Sadhana Phalnikar gave vent to their grief of losing their only son by starting an ambulance service for poor children who could not afford treatment. Slowly and steadily, they have grown to such a scale where they house orphans and abandoned old people with love and care, a hospital, vocational training centre etc.
See the link to understand the scale of their work: www.apalaghar.com
Kalyani, having children away from home is something else but to lose a child in your life time is the greatest tragedy there ever is...I can actually feel the pain those parents suffer and go through all their life .I wonder whether I would ever be able to cope with such a loss ! However, I salute people like Mr Vijay Phalnikar and Sadhana for doing what they are , truly remarkable !
10 years ago
Kalyani Nandurkar replied to the topic Marathi film 'Court' is India's entry for Oscars.
rambabu wrote:
True. Regional movies are well made in all respects. Realism takes the pride of place. I still remember "Shantata Court Chalu Aahe "
That was one iconic movie which is liked and applauded by film lovers even today. There were other really good films too made recently such as Shwaas, Sukhant etc. but did not do much on the box office.
10 years ago
usha manohar liked a reply to the topic A well read individual is Intelligent or Is an Intelligent person well read !.
10 years ago
chinmoymukherjee said thank you to Lopamudra for his/her reply to the topic A well read individual is Intelligent or Is an Intelligent person well read !.
chinmoymukherjee wrote:@Usha I regard the biological source as the primary one and environment to be the facilitating source of intelligence which,to my mind,could be the only rational explanation for varying degrees of intelligence and stupidity both.Otherwise we would be having thousands of Vivekanandas nd Tagores in our midst!!
True and this is what Behavioral genetics is all about. Firstly, not all traits are inherited equally otherwise there would not be any variation .Secondly, environment affects the genes to bring about further differences. Differences therefore are seen among individuals in terms of intelligence, behavior, looks and various abilities such as art , craft, music etc.
10 years ago
chinmoymukherjee liked a reply to the topic A well read individual is Intelligent or Is an Intelligent person well read !.
10 years ago
rambabu replied to the topic Are we leading to Empty Nester Syndrome?.
Separations, unions and sorrow and happiness are the reality of life. They should be accepted as they come. "Be happy thing happened. Don't lament when the happy moments are over."
After all all good things have an end, sooner or later.
10 years ago
rambabu replied to the topic Marathi film 'Court' is India's entry for Oscars.
True. Regional movies are well made in all respects. Realism takes the pride of place. I still remember "Shantata Court Chalu Aahe "
10 years ago
Lopamudra replied to the topic Are we leading to Empty Nester Syndrome?.
For every parent , separation from their children is painful which I think has always been the case but now parents too attached and make themselves too emotionally involved in every aspect of their children's lives as a result the moment they leave nest, the emptiness sinks in. However, most people adjust to the situation since everyone would like to see their children prosper in terms of job /education and be settled and happy in their own lives. It gives more pleasure to know that your kids are away but doing well than sitting at home with you and not doing much!!
10 years ago
rambabu replied to the topic Are we leading to Empty Nester Syndrome?.
Vijay Phalnikar and his better half set an example in showing how the past can be buried and start living in the present. There is no use of crying over the split milk.
10 years ago
Kalyani Nandurkar replied to the topic Marathi film 'Court' is India's entry for Oscars.
It has been proved once again that regional movies with good content and ground reality are better films, even though they may not entertain as much as the Bollywood movies do.
10 years ago
rambabu replied to the topic A well read individual is Intelligent or Is an Intelligent person well read !.
There is saying in Sanskrit. Pandita Putra Sunthaha. Means a sholar's son need not be a scholar always. All traits of a parent generally need not be inherited by the children. In this respect, environment in and around the house and changing times play a key role in shaping a person.
10 years ago
Kalyani Nandurkar replied to the topic Are we leading to Empty Nester Syndrome?.
chinmoymukherjee wrote:
What appeared to be exceptional cases decades back is now endemic and this problem is spreading its tentacles in Indian society. With single child norm being practised on a massiv scale in urban India and parental obsession has acquired a pathological dimensions.I have two shatteringly tragic cases in which both the middle-aged couples
took their lives following the accidental deaths of their only son.The parents have to develop the right kind of detachment and de-obsess,if I am permitted to use right term, from the affairs of their wards which take off to a different trajectory once they grow mature.They have to discover a world beyond their obsessions by engaging more with the bigger world.
So true Chinmoy, it has become very essential for almost all parents to develop this kind of mindset where a single child has become a norm. My own example is no different, my son is just about to turn 8 and I already suffer from separation anxiety, I become too restless when he is out of my sight for more than an hour, with exception of when he is in school. My husband keeps advising me the same thing that you just said, try and start developing certain level of detachment from him, for in just a few years he will grow and leave home for his education, career, then what would I do?
However, it is a different story for parents who lose their only child at a young age, a child leaving home and another leaving this world are quite different things. But it depends on parents how they deal with such crisis. There are some who choose to quit and give up their lives and there are some who channelise their grief into something concrete and worthwhile and extend their love to other children. A couple in Pune similarly lost their young son tragically, Mr. Vijay Phalnikar and Mrs. Sadhana Phalnikar gave vent to their grief of losing their only son by starting an ambulance service for poor children who could not afford treatment. Slowly and steadily, they have grown to such a scale where they house orphans and abandoned old people with love and care, a hospital, vocational training centre etc.
See the link to understand the scale of their work: www.apalaghar.com
10 years ago
Lopamudra replied to the topic Marathi film 'Court' is India's entry for Oscars.
Best wishes to the team...Would love to see the film .
10 years ago
rambabu replied to the topic Marathi film 'Court' is India's entry for Oscars.
I hope, at least this time the Movie Court wins the coveted Oscar, which has been evading India.
I wish Chaitanya Tamhane and India good luck.
10 years ago